INSECURE, Love of the Past
Both with you

I looked around looking for Indra's figure, but I didn't find it. And as if mother understood my confusion, mother told me that Indra was out.

"Aa again came out of the tea through the kitchen door again buy a meal first. I didn't have time to cook, the vegetable maker didn't pass by." Say mother.

"Oh yes ma'am, my pantesan did not see from earlier. I thought I was in the room." My answer.

I was confused to start the conversation, so my eyes noticed the photo on the back wall of the chair I was currently sitting on. Looks like it's a family photo, there's a picture of Dad, mom, Indra and Riri.

The mother who saw me told me the story.

"That's Indra's father now working and coming home once every 3 months,,"

"That first girl friend that I brought to my house.. Aa likes the same story as mom."

My smile embarrassed me.

Geez Indra, I'm ashamed of my story time with his mother anyway..

"2 years ago Aa said she liked someone again, her name was Maria.. Aa very dear to this girl. But I dare not speak. He said it was the same mother". Mom's story.

"He never lied to his mother. From the past if there was any problem Aa likes the same story mom."

"Yes I also do not know if it turns out Indra has long liked me, I just knew yesterday when playing to Curug Bu."

"Yes. So the mother is surprised, it has been a long time since I was never invited to play at home, just this time bring teteh here. You guys haven't been dating yet." Mom laughed a little.

"Yes, Mom." I bow my head in shame.

"Just since yesterday came home, Aa kept smiling. If you ask, he replied instead gini, 'Tomorrow mother also know'. Turns out bring teteh here."

"If Aa has dared to bring you here, it means that Aa is serious. Although it is still very far to the wedding, but Aa will not betray you. I'm sure of that, because I know how Aa kayak is."

"yes Ma.. Mama also loves Indra. Hopefully we're a match, ma'am."

"Aamiin.."

Indra's mother was very nice to chat with, it's just that I was embarrassed so it was still awkward.

When my mother was about to tell me again, I saw Indra already in front of us.

"Mom, I bought the food."

"Yes A, keep it at the table.. Take a meal first!! Tea, eat first. I have business going to RT's house."

"Yes, thank you in advance."

"No need to mention tea."

I just nodded my head.

"Aa, take care of Riri. I'll go first, Assalamualaikum."

"Yes mother, waalaikumsalam." Answer us both.

Now it's just me and Indra, a little nervous together with her.

"But how's mom?"

"Mother eat it later, let's go to the kitchen."

I did it because I was hungry too. It was only eating chocolate bread that was bought by Indra.

After eating, I went out and sat on the porch. Not good will the neighbors think that macem again.

Usually the neighbors mouth pedes like netizens there is no morality that likes to comment unfaithfully. Everywhere there must be neighbors who like kepo and lack of work to manage the lives of others. Not because it cares but more to the Envy.

Indra immediately sat down beside me, she looked at me and asked, "Is there anything you want to tell me not to be the same?"

"You mean?" Ask wonder.

"Yes the story about you, why do you always feel less confident and always feel that you are ugly. You are beautiful though. Same story with me."

"Why do you want to know?" I will not immediately tell the reason behind why I am always insecure and never confident.

"I'm curious to know what causes you to always insecure.. I don't want you to always humble yourself like that. I love you, and I'm afraid that you can't love me just because you always assume that you don't pantes for me."

"You always say I'm handsome, and you're ugly. You always feel like you don't have a boyfriend. There are many people who love and care about you."

"You knew? We have only two hands, we cannot silence all the mouths of those who tell us about our ugliness. I want you to use those two hands to cover our own two ears."

Indra's words just made me realize, that indeed all this time I only focused on people who always insulted me. Until I forget that there are still sincere people who love me like mamah, Indra and Kia.

They love me so much, and that's enough for me. No need to add unnecessary weight!!

I tried to gather strength to tell Indra this. The stories of my past that have an impact on my mental and future life. I was too stupid to remember every bad thing that happened to me.

And I always keep this alone.. There is no place to share, because my feelings hurt when I remember them. Maybe it's time I told Indra this. Sharing his joys and sorrows with him, which is now a part of my life.

"I really want to tell you the same story. But, I'm afraid you'll leave me."

"Why do you think that? Look baby, if you're pretty or ugly, skinny or fat, or whatever happens to you, I'll still love you." Said Indra who rubbed my cheek gently.

"I'm not sure yet!! Because all my cousins are beautiful. Maybe if you meet them, you'll like one of them." My words accuse Indra without evidence. Though I know Indra is not that easy to love someone who is new to her.

"No, my dear.. I promise you. Although there are women as beautiful as anything, I will never be tempted and will never wish you. Trust me, and I can prove it's you." Indra raised her little finger.

I raised my little finger and wrapped my finger with my finger. "Promise?" I asked him, to convince him I told him more.

"My darling promise..." Indra smiled and waited for me to open up to her any problems.

"I'll try to believe what you said Dra. Still want to hear my story?

"Thank you for trying to believe me. And I want to know everything about you."

"Alright, I'll tell you everything about me as you."

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