ELECTORAL MAN
Meylan and again Meylan

Farid

Why is Nini a little weird? I felt a change in his attitude. He kind of looks jutek and cynical to me. Like yesterday when I got caught still keeping Meylan's photo behind a pillow, he didn't seem to like me and insinuated me.

Not only that, his footsteps were like people were getting angry. Yanking. He also started to cheat on me. Singing out loud until her cramped voice is clear and disturbs my sleep.

Is he tired of taking care of me? Could have happened. I realized that, with my condition like this, I was not able to do anything by myself. I need his help.

When I was hospitalized for a long time, Ninis was quick to take care of me. But I don't know, is he sincerely doing it from the heart or because it's bad for mom?

Aah, she could be tired and tired of taking care of me. Or it could be that he was also angry and disappointed in me, considering that I have not yet given certainty about the agreement and compensation that we have talked about.

Before the accident occurred, Ninis had asked about the clarity of his status in my house if Meylan and I canceled to refer. He said that he could not live here with a man who did not love him.

He also asked about the compensation he should receive. So whether or not I refer to Meylan, he still has to get that compensation. Otherwise, he could have exposed all these pretend marriage secrets to either Bu Endang or Mama..

My head suddenly hurt thinking about all that. Why should I be in such a difficult position? moreover, my heart was still always filled with Meylan figure.

Ninis is good. I admit that she took care of me in the hospital. He did not hesitate to help me wear diapers to guide when going to the toilet. He was also not disgusted at washing my dirty clothes.

If only, none of this would have happened. If only I hadn't followed his crazy idea. And now, it was so easy that he canceled everything we had planned and left me. Goddamn bum....

Now I'm really stuck by my own game. I'm confused, totally confused. Should I divorce Ninis and declare everything to mama. Or should I keep a woman like Ninis to stay in this house?

But what about my heart? I have not been able to love as much as I love Meylan. And does Ninis want to be with me? he has no feelings for me either. For him, our relationship is nothing more than a business relationship.

God, is this an expensive lesson I should pay for? I was faced with a hard and difficult choice. If I divorce Ninis, what about Mama? what should I explain to Mama?

If I keep Ninis to be my wife, can I give her my heart? a heart that has been dead for a long time and locked, because the Owner (Meylan) has passed and gone. And I also don't know how Ninis feels about me? are we going to stay in this condition? living a life together without feeling?

Then will we be able to survive? when and how long? what if our parents are suspicious of the fake households we live in?

My head is getting sick. I can't take it anymore. It felt like screaming loudly releasing this tightness. All because of Meylan. Goddamn, dammit.

Why can I be so stupid to follow his wishes. I've done all that he wants to come back to me. Apparently, this is the reply? mmmmm..... My love so great is only considered raw.

Seriate.