RICH MAN
THAT FEELING IS DEAD

That night, Rey came home with a more chaotic appearance than usual. He usually comes home no more than twelve. But now he came home at half-time in the morning because of the burden of the mind he faced.

Regarding the package he received, Rey slowly walked into the house with a messy mind. Especially now that there are women who are always patiently waiting for it at home.

Sure enough, Rey had just entered the house, he found his wife asleep on the sofa. Waiting to come home was a habit for him.

Slowly, he approached his wife and stroked her head until she woke up. As always, Marwa waited for him every night there with the books Rey always found on his chest. Of course he was very afraid of hurting her heart because of the return of the Star to his current life. Weight is when trying to forget the past, but the past comes again when he has tried to accept another woman in his life who will be his companion forever.

Rey looked at his wife fixedly with a gaze that seemed to be unable to be held back by the man anymore.

"Mas, what's wrong with you?" ask the woman while rubbing her eyes.

Rey is silent but smiles and holds his wife's hand.

"Sleep yuk! Why not sleep first?" ask the man. He did not want to cause jealousy to his wife. He wants that everything is fine. Let him face the problem. Not involving his wife especially by discussing other women later on his wife. Rey really could not bear to hurt Marwa just because her photo package along with the Star was revealed by his wife.

"Mas" call Marwa again.

Rey pulled his wife's head and then kissed her slowly. "I'm sorry" he said, hugging his wife. How many times has he tried to be okay in front of his wife if feelings about other women cross his mind. It was never in his mind that leaving Marwa was the best option to pursue the Stars again.

"Mas is fine, right?" ask Marwa.

Asked like that, Rey let go of his embrace and kissed his wife's forehead a second time. Avoiding that problem will only make it a lot more messy again. Perhaps he had to face that despite having to disappoint Marwa. Not wanting to continue pretending to love Marwa when her mind is overpowered by the Stars.

Rey daydreams for a few seconds, "Hey, Mas if tired of just taking a break. Tomorrow we're talking about this!" bring Marwa.

The man nodded then went to their respective rooms simultaneously. Rey, who did not let go of his wife's hand, separated at Marwa's door.

He should be happy with Marwa. But just wanting to open a new heart sheet with another woman, the Star came with a million memories in her life to mess it up inside her.

Of course, for Rey it was the thing she had feared the most all along. The Star's presence as her household along with Marwa is trying to be okay and weave her seriously.

Many words Rey chose to describe her feelings this time. do not want to explicitly say that he still can not love Marwa just because of the presence of a female figure in the past that destroys all her happiness.

Next day.

Breakfast, Rey can still be with the Stars. Even he didn't go to work and was lazing around more in the room. Marwa did not force him to go to the office.

Marwa who saw her husband like that, she approached her husband and slept next to Rey. The two of them faced each other and Rey held her cheek.

"There's something you should know, Marwa. I'm sorry I just said this as long as we're married, whatever Marwa. Whatever I love for you, don't ask to be loved. Because the feeling was dead because of another woman," Rey rubbed his wife's face and saw a tear drop from Marwa's cheek.

"I understand, Mas. That's why you can't ever get closer to me?"

Rey could not hold back her tears. "I'm sorry, I can't. How well I try to love you. Still, it'll hurt you. That feeling was long dead before we met, hence. Let each one live, I will free you, you have the right to seek your happiness,"

"You mean divorce?" marwa said slowly and the man immediately shook his head.

"Give me time for all this, Marwa. I need time to accept this fact, it hurts you. Me too, but I can't keep going like this, see now I hurt you,"

"Loving people who still love their past is very difficult, Mas" said Marwa, releasing Rey's hand from her cheek and wiping her tears and waking up from her bed.

"Sorry,"

"You do need some time alone, Mom. Honestly, I'm happy to be married to you, Mom. I've never been this calm as a stranger, but just as you I know very different things. I chose myself because I couldn't accept anything else, whether it was in my heart who I had been able to accept people all this time, but that time was you, I don't know why that feeling is so strong, Mom,"

Rey fell silent and kept shedding her tears. He was no longer able to pretend to be strong in front of his wife.

"Once again I'm sorry about you, Marwa,"

"You're not wrong, it's just that your feelings are still stuck with other people that I can't accept, Mas. Trying to make you forget it means nothing, I understand now that I'm not there, Mas,"

Rey wiped her tears. "Sorry,"

Marwa got out of the place and then came out of Rey's room. The man did not chase after his wife because he knew that it would be much more painful when he tried to chase after Marwa but his heart was still enveloped by the longing for the Stars.

Rey tries to hold back the bitter after Marwa leaves her room.

He took a long breath. Moving from his bed, he wanted to go to Marwa's room and instead found Marwa who was carrying her suitcase. "Where are you going?"

"You need time to decide everything yourself before it ends, Mas. I don't want you to decide all this just because you're in a state of sadness or emotion. It hurts, Mas. But I can't help your feelings either, can I? So let me go for one week, Mas,"

Rey looked at his wife blankly. It's very hard to accept all this. Moreover, she plans to separate from Marwa and let her feelings just die along with her past.