A SPECK OF LIGHT (Handle of Good-Loving Love)
44. I hate loving you

Excessive love until it develops into blind love can be dangerous. This type of love makes a person lose objectivity in looking at everything, including its shortcomings. In addition, blind love breeds obsession. When someone has started obsessing over a partner, then unconsciously someone has put themselves in a weak position. Because it can be said that a person depends on a partner.

That night, Friends of Mentari High School invited to gather because one of them had a birthday.

Want to call Reza? wanted but not possible. Realize that he is only a mistress and bedmate if needed then in contact.

Tonight Mentari wears a long milk-brown checkered shirt, denim leather pants, matching pasmina hijab with her shirt, and seneakers as well as sling bags.

Arriving at the cafe where they gathered, Mentari could only be silent around his friends. He felt so much change, really scared when the forbidden relationship with Reza was exposed.

His body stiffened when he saw three people walking closer to where they were.

Reza with Diana, the man's girlfriend.

Rizal, his former girlfriend who he was forced to choose rather than Soldier. The man was only a runaway because he wanted to avenge Reza who had cheated him.

He looked away when the two men looked at him. No one knows if he and Reza had a relationship since school, all they know is that Rizal is his ex-girlfriend.

"Ciye, come back, Zal? the same as Mentari?" chirping one of their schoolmates makes Rizal laugh.

The mentor smiled in response. Their relationship ended because they could not connect remotely. Rizal had to go to the capital because he went to college there.

His phone vibrated a sign of a message, he opened it.

Reza :

Happy the ex came?

Mentari :

Wh why? I haven't moved on from her who's been as good as me since.

After answering the message, he put his phone back in and glanced at Reza who was staring hard at him.

For tonight alone, he wants to forget about Reza. Don't ask jealous or don't see Reza with Diana.

The show that night continued. Tonight the soldiers didn't come because Reza didn't work.

"I came home early ya gaes. I'm going to work soon." His permission despite lying then went to a friend who gave a birthday gift that he brought.

He was about to leave, but Rizal called out to him. Forced to turn around. "What, Zal?"

"Go home?"

Mentari. "I brought my own motor."

Rizal nodded. "Be careful."

Mentari forced a smile then glanced at Reza still staring at him sharply. "Yes, thank you." He also say goodbye to his other friends just really gone from the cafe.

...****...

Arriving at the boarding room, he immediately changed his home clothes and removed the makeup attached to his face.

Kosan Mentari is located far from the owner of the boarding house and only once a week comes to check up to many boarding children who bring their girlfriends here to bring their girlfriends or friends.

He saw his phone vibrating with Reza's name on it. "If I could just throw away this feeling and leave you with a little bit of hate, Za."

Shaking the phone continues to interfere until finally Mentari relented.

"What?"

"I'm in front of the kosan. Are you here or am I there?"

"Ish, what? yaudah I'm there."

Mentari is forced to go out to meet Reza in front of his boarding house. His eyes continued to look at the body of the man standing there. Admittedly, Reza is not as handsome as Soldiers but his heart chooses that man.

"More." Reza handed me a packet of food.

"What's this?" ask Mentari while accepting it.

"Fried rice. I saw you haven't had time to eat."

Hearing Reza's reply made Mentari's heart warm. That's how Reza was behind his cruel behavior.

Smiling mentari. "Thank you, have you eaten?" she asked with a smile.

Instead of answering, Reza hugged Mentari tightly making a big question mark.

What happened to Reza?

But you know, Reza is not a romantic guy or attention when outside like this. Since he was in school and had a secret relationship with Reza, it was only when he did that that Reza would reveal what the man felt.

"Let's go eat."

Still with a smile Mentari nodded. On the terrace kosan, Mentari opened a packet of fried rice directly eat it because there is already a spoon of plastic material also in the package of fried rice.

He knows that he is being noticed by Reza. But he felt the man's gaze was different. Like there was something to tell him.

"Start."

"Yes" he answered just back from the front throwing the trash out of the package.

"Next month Diana and I will be engaged."

Deg

Crushed and melted is his life. If so, what to do?

"Why sudden? how do I keep going?" tanya Mentari held tightness in the chest.

"Sorry."

The sun looked at Reza so deeply. "Did you do that to her until you got engaged and got married? what is my fate, Za? no one will want the same woman who has never married but is no longer a girl." jolted Mentari without being able to stem her tears again.

"Don't come near. You're not like the cut man. You're a wedge with Reza." Mentari snapped as Reza was about to hug her.

"Really, I hate that I still love you." After saying that, he went into his boarding room leaving Reza still standing sculpted.

...****...

Reza stared at the nanar Mentari walked quickly by wiping away the tears. Really, he felt that pain.

When knowing Mentari approaching Soldier made him hurt and resist jealousy. But once you know that Mentari failed, there is a sense of happiness in your heart and you want to go back to that woman.

That night, with a definite step came to the city park where Diana had been waiting for her. He tells her to end the relationship and then leave Diana alone.

The next day, Diana's parents come to her mother's house begging her not to end their relationship because Diana tried to kill herself by trying to drink poison. Lucky her parents found out about the woman's actions.

What is Reza's power if the mother begs him. He wanted to reveal what happened to him and Mentari. But he does not want people to know and judge the bad Mentari.

Until one week ago, Diana's parents came back to her mother's house asking her to get engaged to Diana.

Already tried to refuse, but again he could not do anything because his mother was afraid Diana did bo doh action again.

"I'm just as devastated, Mentari. I also hate this self for not being able to do anything for our secret relationship."

❤️

TB