The Romance After Marriage
3.2 | Dilemmas

- Kyra

I really couldn't sleep all night! Even though I was sleepy and then fell asleep it was only able to be a moment and then I woke up again because the thing that was a scourge for me even appeared in my dreams and disturbed!

My head is a bit heavy now. And... Lookie! My eye bags that have been well groomed all this time turned black like panda eyes just overnight!

Hixss... The struggle over the months had finally become a mere waste!

I who just came out of the bathroom with wet hair ran as fast as lightning to the front of the long mirror next to the white dresser. Though maybe just a minute I finished looking in front of the bathroom sink mirror, but it feels like I have to look in front of my favorite mirror again to make sure that what I saw in the bathroom was a bitter reality that must be accepted.

I grimaced wanting to cry seeing those black eye bags actually exist and interfere with the appearance of my face. Hikss!

Today there is an important moment. But why do I have to look like this??

"Where do you want to meet Bang Ezra try this?" I'm meweek. "Well, would you like an invitation?!" My soul, speaking to myself or rather to the mirror in front of me.

Drrr... Drrr...

The sound of the phone vibrating hard enough to make me look up at the nightstand which is right on the right side of the bed that is still struggling. And, of course, the screen is on. Then that means there's an incoming call!

I cringe. There's no thought in my brain who's calling me at dawn. In fact, the sun was still reluctant to get out of his sleep!

I scratch my head. Rather than being curious, I ended up approaching her as well. Again the name came up, making me grunt.

"Assalamu'alaikum, the dawn prayer is ten minutes away. Instead of waiting quietly, please pray at night first mumpung still have time!" I said without giving him a chance to talk.

"Wa'alaikum..." After answering that greeting, he clucked. "What the hell?! I've been tahajjud this time." His words even made me tick.

"Ohh..." Short reply.

"Oh, doang??"

"What else do I have to say?" I asked back, not thinking.

"Yes, what cake, as long as it's not 'oh' doang!" The reply to sewot.

I grunt. This fellow... Even though it is still not morning, it has become difficult to pull the neck muscles only! Ck.

"Jude, yes..." I said relented.

"Tell!" Reply sucks.

Astagfirullahaladzim yes, this one man! My complaint is in my heart. Sometimes you have to be a lot of patience.

"What do you really want? I was amazed, early in the morning has burned a massive emotion!" My grunts are half dead.

"Haha..."

Kontan, I glared when I heard him laugh without sin.

"Loe... Persambet huh?" This is my assumption because I felt she was very vague this morning.

"Have a son!" Reply not accepted.

"Kok weird??" My toot. "Eh, but you're weird almost every day anyway... Forgot me!"

"Hush! Can't say it's the same as the prospective husband, pamali tau!" He started again. I turned the puffed-up eyeballs.

"So in essence you want to do my phone so early in the morning, huh??" I asked to ignore his speech before. Better to find a new topic of conversation than to be stuck with the 'prospective husband'!

"Eng... No, I'm just a prankster. Curious also why my chat semalem just read but not bales."

I grimaced to hear the reason. Why is it that I'm being charged back by my own girlfriend?!

"Lo just called because he wanted to get a reply to chat last night, so??" I don't believe it.

"Yes, you guys wake up so you don't mishap the subuhannya. Uh, but you're awake, huh? Nice, nice..."

I grunt. I don't know why it sounded like an alibi in my ear.

"Hell, don't be confused. I know, isn't that what you want to talk about me?!"

Suddenly he turned silent. Makes me cringe.

"Delvin??!"

He was still silent too.

"Vin, Delvin, woy!"

"Huh?" Finally his voice appeared.

"So...?" I hung up my sentence. But I'm sure, he who's sensitive sharp must know very well what I mean.

"Yes, yeah... I-i..." He hung up his sentence.

I cringe. Why did he stutter like that? "Gue... I what??"

"Yes... Like," I said not sure.

"Tok wearing a kayak anyway??"

"Yes, right, I don't know if he's home today or not. Kan, you said you have to love Bang Ezra right?!" Even my eyebrows went up because I said it.

"Yes, great. Direct love. Don't give it to the ART!"

I grunt. "Yes, yes, Bawel!"

"Yee... Even doing it again! Fuck up!" Curse it at me. Which even makes me tick.

"Judek. Yes, it was... Adzan tuh. Prepare for prayer gih. Hye!" He said he was going to end this conversation.

I cringed in wonder. Strange, people who remind worship but forget how to say hello?! Ck.

"Wa'alaikumsala..." My insinuation.

There was a sound of snoring from there. I rolled my eyeballs. "Ehiya, forgot!" He grinned again. "If so... Wassalamu'alaikum, About!"

"Hm, wa'alaikumsalam."

And the call was cut off.

I stared at my phone in silence for a while. For a moment I thought something was stirring up from this conversation. Somehow my feeling was that Delvin was worried about my meeting with Bang Ezra later.

But... Why should he be worried? Didn't that meeting also exist because he told you to?? Was he afraid that after I met him I would go back to Bang Ezra instead of staying with him?

Uh! Maybe it's just my assumption that's wrong.

Why would Delvin worry about that. He just wanted to make sure, like he said. We have no feelings for each other yet!

Haha... It seems like my brain is a bit troubled.

"Duhh, this must be because it's hard to sleep all night!" My curse to myself.

***

I looked at him fixedly. From the radiance of my eyes this has also emitted a meaningful seriousness. I handed the invitation paper to him.

"Bang Ezra's... Here," My voice became softer than usual.

I cringe. Then grunt. "Kok, does that sound sad?"

I started scratching my head. More precisely, confused how to behave.

"Gettle! Repeat it!" Seruku himself.

Then I prepared to look back at the big mirror that even surpassed me in height.

"Bang Ezra, this is...! Don't forget to come?" And, I smiled broadly.

I grunt. Then, head bobbles. "Squeen!"

Sighing, I repeated the scene several times with a change of expression.

Right, right now I'm training before I take a real plunge on the battlefield. I mean, this is preparation before meeting Bang Ezra in person.

"Bang Ezra's..."

"Bang Ezra this..."

"Don't forget to come, Bang Ezra!"

I don't want to derail the plan in plain sight just because I can't bear to cry later and confess that for more than ten years I've loved it. This is my attempt to keep my defense from collapsing upon meeting him in person later.

My heart is beginning to wonder. How will he react when he finds out that I'm going to marry Delvin?

Is he happy? A laugh? Just ordinary? Or the... Grieved??

What if her reaction was really sad? What if he even let out tears of sadness when he let me go?

Will my defense falter then? Would I prefer Bang Ezra instead of Delvin who has even struggled for me to this point??

I messed up my hair in frustration. Sitting on a nearby chair and sighing deeply. For a moment I stared at the invitation paper I had been holding.

This gaze felt sad with an uncertain feeling that enveloped.

I shouldn't have gamang. Why is it now a dilemma??

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