Don't Say Love (BOOK 2)
Chapter 5

With an almost worn-out white T-shirt and long jeans, Arnetta felt that her appearance this time was completely inappropriate alongside Jullian. Her clothes were quite embarrassing to set foot in this place. Especially when he first came with Jullian, several pairs of eyes looked at him suspiciously, as if he was being mistaken for entering the place. And again, Jullian who wears a blazzer looks very elegant and does not deserve to be with him. When this happens, no one thinks they are a couple. Arnetta was a little grateful and disappointed.

The woman moved uneasily in her place. Although he sat quietly, he did not notice that his hand was shaking violently. The afternoon atmosphere with delicious food dishes should be enough to calm himself down, but the gaze of Jullian's eagle eyes that kept intimidating him ruined everything. It felt like Arnetta got up and left the place. If it ends up like this, he won't accept Jullian's invitation to come to this place.

For some reason, Arnetta felt that Jullian could easily influence her. The gentleman's tenderness was still the same when they last dated. It was the last memory. Beautiful memories before he discovered the fact that Jullian was married to Lusi.

"How are you, Arnetta? I heard you just got back from abroad." Jullian was busy cutting the meat in front of him as often as he could look towards Arnetta.

"Y-Yes, that's it." Arnetta felt his throat was very dry, but from the beginning he drank more mineral water in front of him than eating meat that should have tasted very delicious.

But, who could look fine if at this moment someone who had been present in the bottom of his heart was in front of his eyes. The man looked fine, even very good. Arnetta guessed inwardly that Jullian was happy enough with his present life.

'Without.'

Jullian responded with a brief nod, as if not very interested in what the woman was doing there. "If I'm allowed to know, what exactly are you doing with me?"

A wry smile could not bear to not Arnetta show in front of the man. Her heart ached hearing Jullian's familiar call to Rivai. Had the man really married her, whether Jullian would have called Rivai the same or not. Just imagining it made Arnetta lose face.

"My mom is sick." The sentence slid off without a command, and also Arnetta's grim expression. Imagining how her mother was currently in need of her pierced her heart. As a child Arnetta felt useless. All this time Ratih never took his medicine. The disease that he thought was no longer appearing, is now increasingly becoming.

"illness?"Jullian looked a little surprised by his two raised eyebrows. Arnetta never knew if her father had never discussed anything with his daughter-in-law.

Arnetta who realized what he had said was wrong, stuttered immediately. "Ah, no. Just a regular pain."

"You need money?"

Jullian's question immediately pierced right in his heart. He felt the question was like an arrow. His entire body was cold hot considering Jullian was able to easily guess what difficulty he was facing. It might be like Lusi and also a boy named Arif. It was not wrong for the little boy to look at him suspiciously.

Arnetta felt that he looked like a beggar, until Jullian knew his purpose in coming to Rivai's house. But, what you want to say, he has already lost his direction. His pride had already fallen when he first decided to set foot in the house, even though he knew that the family would never welcome him. 

"My mother should be operated on immediately. I can't have any more purpose to ask other than the man who is my own real father. I need money for my mother's care. Yesterday, when I just arrived in Indonesia, my mother fell unconscious. At the hospital, the doctor said that my mother did not take her medication regularly, which worsened her condition and had to undergo surgery immediately. They are asking for 500 million for all medical expenses. I don't have anything to sell, after my mom sold our house to Rivai." Arnetta lowered her face. Between shame and tightness he felt after admitting all that, especially in the man who once inhabited his heart. In fact, until now.

For a long time both of them were silent. Arnetta waited, knowing he had made his pride even more mired in admitting his distress to Jullian. He didn't expect Jullian to help him. For some reason, in the depths of his heart Arnetta did not feel the heartache that he had been pending. Meeting directly with Jullian makes the pain and hate evaporate and change with longing. A pair of beautiful eyes belonging to the man managed to make him fall in love again. The feeling overflowed within his chest as if he was quarreling with his common sense.

He was eager to hug this man, kiss him, and hold him. Arnetta thought he might have gone almost crazy. His stance to not fall in love with Jullian turned out to be just the wind. In fact his heart always turned back on Jullian's side, even if it was forbidden. He must be aware that his presence here is nothing more than asking for help. The fact that Jullian is now his brother-in-law makes a barrier wall that he cannot jump over. Arnetta should know his limits as an outsider.

But his mother ...

"Arnetta, raise your face and look at me." The tone of the command from Jullian was like an automatic code that made Arnetta unhesitatingly look at him. His pair of black eyes had been inundated with tears ready to fall at any moment.

"Help me."

The woman can no longer control her emotions. In the inner upheaval he felt very tormented. Nothing else can calm him down. Not a thought drifted towards his mother, nor did his aching heart face Jullian. Thinking about how her life could be ruined like this, Arnetta felt like God was testing her too far. He doesn't know his plan. All he knew was that his heart was now broken. So hurt.

"I'll help you, Arnetta." Jullian said slowly.

He wiped those tears rough. His feelings were not the slightest bit light, but he felt calmer. He didn't know and didn't care what made Jullian so easy to help him. As Arnetta knew, the Jullian sitting before him was his savior angel. He did not know how he would repay Jullian's kindness. Though only words, he knew Jullian was indeed intent on helping him.

"Thank you" he said slowly. "I don't know how to repay your kindness. I'll do whatever you ask."

For God's sake! Arnetta feels great. At least the weight on his shoulders had lifted by itself. However, unwittingly by the woman Jullian is now smiling lightly when he hears Arnetta's words that will grant whatever he asks.

"Later tonight come to the Horrison Hotel, the same place where we first had dinner, Arnetta."

DEG

The smile on the woman's face decayed instantly. His surroundings seemed to stop and only left his rough-sounding heartbeat. The pair of round eyes widened towards Jullian who was looking at him slightly sharply. There, of course, Arnetta still remembers how she tricked Jullian and pretended to be Lusi. He doesn't know if Jullian still remembers him, just like he does.

"The past let it be the past. I realized that at that time we were too carried away. I should have thought clearly at that moment. It was a fatal mistake in my life."

Arnetta could only smile wryly. How could Jullian decipher all the moments they passed together at that time was a mistake. Maybe for him it was completely meaningless, but for Arnetta the memories were like ulcers that would never just disappear. Until this moment all the laughter and jokes, and love between them he still recorded in his memory. Nothing was left behind every second, especially when Jullian expressed seriousness before his mother. 

"Nine night hours. Come, and ask one of the rooms that Jullian Basuki has reserved."

"Room?" Arnetta is back. Never imagined what kind of work would be given Jullian in a hotel room that he did not recognize well. He had been there once, but only for dinner with Jullian. Not more.

As if reading the woman's mind, Jullian immediately corrected his words. However, he still decided to get up from his chair. "There's one female partner I have to keep with until her husband comes back with me for a meeting. I'm only asking you for one thing."

Jullian took out a business card from one of his Blazzer pockets and gave it to Arnetta, "Send me a short message of your account number. This afternoon I'll send money for your mother's surgery. Then excuse me, Arnetta Revallina."

Arnetta's mind was suddenly empty. Throughout Jullian's speech, he did not take it well at all. His brain was too slow to process everything that was happening before his eyes. Jullian who had so easily given her a little help made her instincts feel scared. Whether the sense of what was currently enveloping the niche in his heart, he was afraid to see Jullian's face which seemed to imply something bad a while before his departure. It's just that, for now Arnetta has to think positively with everything there is. Only Jullian hopes now considering Rivai has lost his hand over everything that happened to his life.

May God be kinder to her.

***

An afternoon breeze brings him back, forcing him to recall how the life of an Arnetta was before the foolish pact he had with Lusi. The years passed very quickly. He could not remember where the pain started. Ever since Lusi asked her to pretend to be him, or when she saw Jullian hanging out with her half-brother?

Everything just happened without wanting him to re-create.

His view again fell on the expanse of land that might soon be built a new building. This flattened land bears silent witness to the time she and her mother spent together. Before everything changed, his life was fine.

In five years everything changed. Arnetta felt like he had just closed his eyes, and when he opened it he was already in a different place. This isn't him. Years and years that he never expected changed his life. Now he can only resign and pray that Jullian can lighten his burden. He would do anything to repay the man's kindness.

"You should know how he looks!"

"Yes, I should have seen it."

Arnetta's gaze turned to two women wearing formal office clothes. The two seemed to enjoy their conversation so much that they did not realize that a pair of eyes looked longingly. When one of them noticed Arnetta's presence, he stopped.

"Neeta ..."

The woman who was originally giggling immediately fell silent slowly. The sight of the three of them also flashed in silence. Despite the longing, the three of them had no intention to pour out those stifling feelings.

Arnetta who was on the other end noticed a different look being cast on him. It is implied that the two men were surprised to see his presence, but another look he did not expect was seen. Rowena, one of the friends and owners of the bar where she used to work, no longer looked at Arnetta in the same way. There was clearly a feeling of resentment to see the presence of the woman again in front of him. Unlike the woman who was next to him, Maria. The woman simply fell silent with a meaningless expression.

Instantly, the expressions of his two friends confused him.

"I'm saying goodbye first. Give my regards to your husband, Maria." Said Rowena who immediately stepped past Arnetta wide.

The sight did not escape the gaze of an Arnetta who had been his friend. For five years, he had no idea what had happened to him or his two best friends. He only went to accompany his mother to seek treatment. For the rest, he knew nothing more.

"Hello, Neeta." Maria stepped closer to Arnetta who was still in confusion. "It turns out being in a country of people makes it easy to forget the past, huh?"

"M-Marya, ... What's going on?" For his umpteenth, he just found the question sentence in his brain, after confusion to see the attitude of Rowena who is no longer friendly with him.

The woman seemed to be giving a small smile. Not the smile that Arnetta liked, but vice versa. Maria smiled as if to mock him. Like Arnetta has done something wrong without feeling guilty.

"Whatever you don't understand, it's too late. Now we know who we each are. Thank you for reminding."

"I ..."

Marian stepped slowly leaving Arnetta stricken with confusion and disappointed. He was inexhaustible with the attitude of his two friends who suddenly changed drastically. Shouldn't he be the one who asked and needed to be answered, but what he got instead made his heart even heavier. Arnetta looked up, calling for Mary. However, his intention was never realized when he realized the sight of a narrow back walking away from him.

Unknowingly, her tears were dripping. Deep inside his chest, the tightness began to feel. He lost his breath, he's alone now.

Everything disappeared like dust without him noticing, and it was unknown where the mistake was located.

"What's really going on?" His murmurs were full of sadness.