Don't Say Love (BOOK 2)
Chapter 1

A tinge of mist clouded one's gaze toward the outside of the window. His slow, regular breathing in the year-end season made the gusts feel even more real. His nose and mouth let out hot vapors until they turned red. His footrest on a thick pile of snow, like stepping on a pile of cold and white mud.

A woman leaves a trail of where she goes. One of the huts in the middle of forestry, with shady trees makes itself as if it is the only resident in this world. He and someone were waiting for his arrival this evening in a wheelchair. The woman knew the figure would always sit waiting for her arrival.

He felt guilty, that's all.

The smile that had burst from her lips was like a sore reminder needle that would haunt her. That painful smile seemed like a shame to her. Wouldn't it be better to be silent, and act like he's sick? No. gabe. He himself did not want to see that.

When the woman arrived in front of the snowy yard that sucked her legs, her guess was right. The figure was waiting for him on a wheelchair. His marsupial gaze turned himself upwards. His pale face did not hinder his intention to look at what was above his head, above him.

The woman stopped stepping. From this distance, the pain is getting worse. He knew that figure must be counting. The least amount anyone wants to guess. Instead of counting, all lebibh choose to enjoy what is there. It doesn't matter if all that could have been frowned upon because of a catastrophe, a trial from God.

He tries to understand. All this pain will surely produce a sweet love. He believes to this day that the woman's hope has never been broken as long as the figure has always been with her. To him, only that figure was needed. Many times more valuable than his own life. No one will understand, including the men who have ruined their lives. The men had never known how valuable a woman was. They can just play games.

Throw it away after getting bored.

Toys. Women are just toys of men. The woman entrusts only one love, the love between mother and child. The most sincere feeling he ever felt. Not to his father, not to the man.

"Arnetta!"

The screams are still the same. The figure still called out to him excitedly even though the years they had passed could not be said for just a moment. The woman should smile. They moved to this place not to be sad. There's still a lot they need to think about.

Arnett. The long-haired woman, letting coldly wash away the surface of the black sheen of her hair dangling from the knitted hat she was wearing. The weather was a thousand times colder the twilight weather that day. He could have sworn that tonight was just a blanket he needed. To hell with all the books he's ever brought into a room in their house.

The steps of the woman stepped onto the snowy streets of her home yard. The smile that was just a moody moment has now changed. The happy light must be displayed. They are happy, and they should be happy. In a City that no one knows him, it will certainly make Arnetta love his life more today.

Five years.

Isn't it a short time to start a life. Continuing what was originally there feels meaningless. No one wants to bring the pain of the past into the future. They will tend to shut themselves out of the past, especially the worst part. That's what Arnetta and her mother did until this very moment.

As a new person in this place, he already knew his portion as a family of immigrants. He tried to get along, make his own money and take care of his mother, the sick Ratih. The old life for him would never have any meaning. Everyone is dead, it feels paralyzed. Along with past events, Arnetta has delegated her life to take care of her mother and be happy.

Jullians.

Arnetta always felt that there was something stifling inside her chest when the name stuck in her mind. His face that Arnetta could still remember clearly, the typical heavy voice of the man sometimes echoed into his eardrum without his permission. Like a ghost, Arnetta often felt that the man was near her, had a plan to embrace her, embrace her, and never let go.

But, everything sounds so impossible.

Only God and that man knew his heart. Jullian is happy. The man had a beautiful sheet that could not possibly be exchanged for a painful wound with a woman named Arnetta.

From the beginning, their stories were meaningless. There is no meaning in a short meeting that starts from a lie. Now, the man may realize how inappropriate Arnetta is to be with him. Jullian prefers a safe zone to step in. An area that won't pollute his life is like a new paper. Clean without blame.

Along with her, Arnetta feels Jullian will only get into trouble. The man could probably have received opposition from any side. Arnetta could not imagine how painful rejection would be. Until now, Arneta never knew what relationship status he was currently living. There was never a parting word that came from the man's lips at the time.

Arnetta. A beautiful wedding, with a pair of happily smiling brides. The sparkle of love can not be captured by people around. Jullian is happy with Lusi.

Arnetta will be here with his mother. That's what matters.

When he reached the front porch, right in front of the wheelchair of the mother he was sitting in, Arnetta knew Ratih was very good at reading his mind. The middle-aged woman's face faded again. Maybe because of her, Arnetta thought.

"What's up, kid? You still thinking about it?"

Arnetta. He never thought about Jullian. The woman had no idea how to explain it to her mother. If this is the case, Arnetta knows the mother will definitely connect root by root to be a romance story in her life. But, his mother could not agree if until this moment Jullian still dominated his mind. His sense of well-being did not go well when he remembered the man.

Angrier.

Be ill.

Weary.

Longs.

That's the last word Arnetta could never accept. He can accept all the statements made by some of his friends at the club. They say no one can appreciate a woman like this. His mother never knew about it. Ratih always thought Arnetta worked in a restaurant as a waiter. The work was never known to anyone, even Arnetta refused to open her identity there. He always looks attractive and wears thick makeup so as not to be recognized.

I don't know what would happen if her mother knew all this. He could not even look at the pale face of Ratih that was filled with strokes of disappointment. Arnetta has spent a lot of time disappointing her own mother. He felt sinful for the last few years they knew London was full of lies. Arnetta also lied that Rivai had laid off their financing.

Since the last year they spent in Singapore, Rivai has no longer sent them money. The high medical costs there make Arnetta have to stop the best treatment and short there. He tried to contact Rivai with a futile ending.

"It's okay, Mom. Why are you outside?" Tanya Arnetta quietly. He tried to smile even though his heart ached to see the condition of the mother who was getting worse and worse. He did not know if their move made his mother's condition worse. In their early years of treatment smoothly, the condition of Ratih can be said to be good. Maybe, ... his mother is still there until now because of the care they once ran.

While here, Arnetta had himself ready to buy all the medicine his mother needed. The usual therapy is often done while in Singapore, it is rarely done here. Cost and time. Arnetta barely has any of that.

"I'm waiting for my son to come home. How was your day Arnetta?" Ask Ratih in the shade. The look in her eyes made her look at her daughter's face even more minimal.

"Good." Only one word he knew. Actually not good. Arnetta let some of the men's hands touch her without her permission. Arnetta couldn't resist. Any man who had hired him to accompany her drank freely did any touch to her. That's where he gets paid and that's his job. Arnetta even wore very short clothes, smiling seductively at the striped-nose men who came to her. Somehow his heart ached considering how pitiful the effort he made was just to earn money. He didn't know when it was all going on. He himself could not imagine how much longer he had to do a job as a comfort woman there. Luckily, she was still able to maintain her only self-esteem as a woman. He could still refuse to do so.

She was looking after only her husband.

"Come, we're in." Bring Arnetta raucous. Imagining the longer his life this time, the more it carried his pierced chest. No one will ever know the problem, because Arnetta always swallowed it alone.

No one else, including her own mother.

Arnetta's clasped hands took over the push of the wheelchair the mother was riding on. He pushed into Ratih with a very slow movement. This is the time between her and her mother. How nice it would be to imagine this going on forever. The thought that he decided not to marry made his heart ache.

Just before they managed to walk through the door, Ratih's raucous voice made the nerves of Arnetta's movement slump. The words that were embedded as they nearly entered the gate of his new life were shattered instantly. Not a question, it's an order.

"Arnetta, let's go back to Indonesia."