After He's gone
thirty four. Prejudice

Alana was still smiling hearing Arkan talk about Ananta even though he was in a more miserable state. He shook his head slowly after observing once again Arkan's state from head to toe. A little upset because he's this guy is both more worried about others than he is about himself.

Unlike Arkan and Alana who look relieved, Bella actually looked at Alana with an inexplicable gaze. He stared suspiciously before pulling Alana to go out of the room, he wanted to talk alone with Alana.

"sister.." said Bella after pulling Alana out of the room after a few minutes of visiting Arkan.

"yeah?" Alana answered hesitantly, she was afraid that Bella would ask the things that she had been afraid of these few days.

"today's the first day Arkan wants to talk. Previously when asked he only nodded or shook his head, never making a sound" Bella said in a serious tone. Makes Alana feel like she's going to hear bad things.

"i guess it's because he can't talk. But after hearing her painstakingly talk to sister. It seems, before this he just did not want to talk" said Bella issued her concerns about Arkan. Bella can't help but think badly of seeing Arkan himself worry more about Ananta than herself.

Alana nodded in understanding what Bella was. He is still trying hard to think positive, although the atmosphere built Bella clearly said otherwise.

"well, maybe a man's friendship is like that. They think more of their friends than themselves." replied Alana as she was. Friendship between men is difficult for women to understand.

"sister..." Bela called out to Alana again with a more serious look.

"Arkan had never previously signed up as a heart donor. He's been applying since he entered High School. Since I knew Ananta. And after that I just found out that Ananta has heart disease" he said expressing suspicion that he really wants to pendam himself forever. But, now he was afraid that something bad would happen to Arkan again if he didn't say it.

"you mean" Alana was shocked by this fact. Why does Bella's suspicion lead to bad things, too. She finally looked at it from another point of view, making her gawk almost in disbelief after realizing Bella's intentions. His eyes are glaring. His hands are holding his own mouth.

"it's impossible" he said. Trying to find other possibilities that could have happened. But it did feel strange when Arkan accident right the day after Ananta entered the hospital with a condition severe enough. Arkan was also the first to take Ananta to the hospital.

"i don't want what I really think to happen either. But.. I think no-no every time I see the Arkan look like despair." said Bella explained the state of Arkan when she first opened her eyes. He, as if he did not think that he survived.

"usually I see those eyes when he's planning bad things for himself." Alana's eyes widened again. That silly guy ever planned bad things for himself? what does.

"what do you mean?" Alana stared in disbelief. Honestly, he doesn't know much about Arkan, but he doesn't know he's that million about Arkan.

"even though she looks so cheerful, she often hates herself. I used to entertain him every day, taking him to play so he wouldn't drown in gloomy moods. I was the first to see him smile again, but I was also the first to realize there were many wounds on his wrist. Her past made it easy for me to think badly of it" Bella said at length, explaining her past with Arkan that no one had ever known.

"and this..." Bella took out a shabby paper from her pocket.

"this was found in his pocket the day he had his accident" he handed the paper to Alana. The writing on the same made his suspicions strengthen. A fact that seems ironic.

"sister." call Bella again even though Alana never distracts from her in the slightest.

"i really love Arkan and I don't want to lose him" he said sincerely. Like Alana, she also cried a lot because of Arkan in the past.

"i know.we have to watch over them more. lest they do stupid things again.yes?" alana said she gave the best solution for now. I don't know what the real reality is. The important thing is that they have to heal before Alana and Bella go deeper.

"this shitty hunk of a hobby just worries me. huh." Alana grunts annoyed. Just a little kidding. Actually, he was now very anxious about the things that would happen in the future.

Alana pats Bella on the back, to give her strength. They must be strong, because they already like annoying men with various life problems. These people have become a source of headaches as well as a source of happiness. Alana pulls Bella into the room again. Meet arkan who is a little peeking looking for both. He was left alone in the room. Suddenly he felt lonely even though he was left for only a few minutes.

"Arkan" said Alana after taking a deep breath.

"Ananta has got a heart donor, and will be operated on in a few days.You don't worry about it" he said. Lying of course. There was no word from his father about any other donors. But according to Alana he had to do it so Arkan could calm down. If Arkan is planning on doing bad things for Ananta, he hopes Arkan stops thinking about doing it after this.

"alright" replied Arkan smiling slightly with a cast still attached making his neck feel stiff.

"cepet healed.so we can walk the four of us again" said Alana. Well, I wish I could. If God intervenes, nothing is impossible.

"yes" Arkan replied in a soft voice. Alana's heart is a little more relieved now. He was ready to go back to Ananta's room. He felt his chest feel freer now, he was like he could breathe again. Though it was followed by bad thoughts about what Arkan might have planned.

Alana remembers her lie to Arkan once again. Ah, if that lie really happened, could we be happy again? ask Alana in my heart. One more empty hope that he said with his mouth. Ah, Alana is tired of constantly thinking about things that have not happened. All possibilities are just possibilities before they actually happen.

The hope that he raised more often did not happen. At that point he was lazy to hope again. But for Ananta, he ended up floating that empty hope once again. If his do'a is more sincere, will it be granted?