This Love Kills Me Slowly
this love is slowly killing me
bah 4 strength
every night there is a doubt to sleep with my wife, yes I know the look on her face is reflected in the disappointment of a man who expected her not as seen
but all of this is hidden behind a smile
what's more we're still living with my parents as much as we can try to look friendly.
diah works at one of the numn banks in the tajur area.
that night, we had 2 to discuss the problem I was facing, she suggested to consult sexsiology I also mengnya
but in my heart I will look for another alternative
as an ordinary man, it is natural that he wants her because he is married
what's more our relationship has been almost half a month but not at all having sex
my mind floated though she did not urge me but I was still burdened because the main problem was with me
in the middle of my mind that bounces accidentally my eyes see a sign of the name of traditional medicine
below him with a large enough writing
"massage vitality "in conjunction with "blue pills"
" strong medicine "immediately I looked for a way to turn around because it was across my path
far enough indeed to turn back even more when the clock comes home from work, the traffic is certainly severe, and,
actually I quite often read ads like this but, it never occurred to me to use his services
and now I need her
I edge my vehicle so as not to increase congestion, there are about 3 men waiting for a call, while waiting for me busy surfing with my gadget, after my turn the therapist asked about my complaint,
what answer is whether there is his that I am newly married and the condition of mine is not possible to fight
I wait for a moment the therapist is preparing the medicine
10 Pieces of the drug have been prepared
" it's at 1x drink at least 1 hour before having "his word on me
"all how many sir "ask me
" 1 of his 60 thousand drugs there are 10" he said
after I paid for my stay right then, when I looked in front there was another patient waiting
the clock was 19:20 when I arrived to pick up Diah
I was let in by the security guard to wait inside
before my boredom approached me, we planned to eat outside
on the way, she asked
" i've been to sexsiology "ask her
" it's "my word with a smile
" trus his word what "
" in the drug "
when I got home, I saw my mom and dad watching, too,
mama stood up to greet me, and did not forget me kiss her cheek as well as my wife
" mam pap adi went straight to his room" ki said
" it's nothing "my mom said to me on just a lampstand
" you have eaten "asked my mother
" you have eaten outside" I replied
" it's good that my mom doesn't cook about her "
" where to go ma"
" he's sick "
" ooo, yes, come in first "
when I was in the room, she was taking a bath while I slept in the bed
when I remember the powerful medicine
immediately I drink. in 5 minutes at the beginning has not shown a reaction
after she came out, finished the shower
I now clean my body
only 15 minutes in the bathroom
my heart started pounding my breath began to hunt, a little bit claustrophobic
I took a shower but I felt quite hot in my body,
the strong medicinal reaction began to feel, my lust began to rise
but my brain was still thinking clearly, my weapon began to show its wild activity, while in bed
I began to explore my wife's body, from every indentation, her twin material cradle began to be explored
I started making it, my hand 1 playing with his red beans
diah began to show his counterattack, I felt in my hand that playing with his red beans was wet and sticky
his body began to feel hot, his eyes began to shut
I began to enter her body, and we were united
her eyes were closed, mine was like tightly clutched, warm and wet
******* breaths I can hear clearly, I keep pushing
am I enjoying it ?? not at all lust and my brain has a mind
2 Hours passed I could also spit out my hot lava and
she whimpers in pain
" aak hurts, aak hurts" cried out in my ear
diah looked exhausted while I was in pain in my gun that had not yet spewed his bullets
my waist feels so sore
if anyone says it's impossible that I don't enjoy it, I swear to myself or your son to accept this punishment so that you can feel what I feel
" no already!! aching" groaned on me to stop my activities,
diah tried to regulate her breathing.
and all of a sudden I had a headache, a tension in all the veins of my head all the way to my back, which made me uncomfortable
I got out of bed and did my manual activities
I am really tormented by this situation
without sound is just my hand playing activity
teraa grievous in my weapon, but still I force it to come out so that my veins become saggy, my hands feel very sore, as I spit out the pain in my head slightly reduced
I forced myself to do this
why am I using myself, then,
no more no less because she is my wife.
this suffering may not be comparable when for the 2nd time I met with aak asep
day 3 after the death of my grandmother, in Sunda called mother held event
after the incident, the neighbors began to gather to pray for my grandmother.
so too with my grandmother's children
as the event was about to begin, all eyes looked towards the door including me observing anyone who came, because the room inside was still empty, my eyes were fixed on the fitri tea behind her was her husband, and I did not expect that aak asep had come to that place as well. my heart that still has not received its presence immediately came out of that space
"where are you going" asked my cousin
"in the heat will come out" I said.
I sit in the cottage on the road, there is a community garden near him, this is the land bnn in the local people work for gardening
grandma's house went into an alley about 20 meters away,
as I sat down I saw someone quite tall walking towards me, because it was a little dark I could not be sure who that man was
" hey!! teteh search adi "arrive the arrival of fitri tea in front of me behind her there is her husband
" emang adi there is a problem with asep" said his "neeh want to know aja "
" just ask with a sip of tea "heart rumbles holding back my tears from falling
thankfully it was a little dark that night
"teh asked that's you, teteh not understand" asked the curious fitri tea
" tea wants to go up " said I tried to avoid
" adii you must tell me "teh fitri holds my hand
I no longer have my tears falling
fitri tea tried to embrace me
" you have to be patient !!! " said fitri tea while embracing me
maybe this word is wise enough for some people and quite entertaining but actually this is not a word of comfort but the word judgment
my emotions are a little overflowing
" tea was impatient again "my word with my voice pressed and slightly vibrated restraining my emotions and holding back my tears from falling
"family adi. brother adi, parents adi no one knows tea "I was silent for a moment to hold my breath
" from 10 years of tea until now no one knows, less patient what is it" I said again
"therefore, I want to know what happened "
" ask with. aak asep what she did when she was a child first" I said in a slightly meningi voice
I try to ease my emotions I set my breath
" he does not want to tell the story "said teh fitri
" by the way at thati ituin "continue fitri tea
hmmm it turns out he really pecunda, I stay fitri tea and walk up, I,
for me
it's a disgrace and I'm so embarrassed to reveal it that all the names are pseudonyms and places I've moved a little and I'm vague on behalf of my family and my shame for hidden settings
I was a boy even though I was just a kid
when a woman can complain she can cry
but for a boy when crying
" eeee boy kok nangis "the word is often teased in my ears so I hide my problems
I let them with their minds I don't care what's in their brains
" grandpa!!! dedek why "I was surprised when I walked in front of me already there aak andi
" what's wrong here" I asked
" fuck out crying "du rubbed his remaining tears
"that's who's there talking to you"
I'm afraid aak Andi is forcing me to tell me more "eeeee's a fitri tea with her husband" I said
" what's wrong" I asked
"why not even yasinan "ask aak andi too
" why are they there "ask aak andi
" just have a normal conversation" answered me andy's eyes sharply looking at me
my eyes try to avoid the gaze of Aak andi
"grandfather look at the eyes of aak "I want to run but my hands are held tightly by aak andi
" why the hell" asked me which made it even more uncomfortable.
" what is hiding from the sea"
I'm gonna change my eyes
" look at aak adek.."
"adek wants to go on aak, adek want to himself first "
" khaaahhhh aak wait when adek want to tell ya" aak andi also let go of my hand
dark deserted here, man,
only the sound of the night beast broke the silence
I am part of your creation God, my heart is only the smallest part I have but it holds all the burdens I feel
am I too whiny, though,
or I'm too cowardly to face reality
or I'm just too stupid to bear all this alone
" hello mamm" when my phone rang
" here is dear" asked my mother
" adi again look at the atmosphere of the night above maa"
" adi came home first here adek adek you on the search "
" he's a mama "
as I walked downstairs, I met my cousin
" well why not yasinan"
" no more messing up "
" aak said wawak returned home "
" he also wants to go home "
when I was at Grandma's
still I met aak asep and husband tea fitri. aak asep did not dare to lift his face
his face bowed in front of mama, aak andi, and papa, maybe to move he felt afraid
when asked, the answer is very short
even though I saw her like that, I still hated her.
I know he came yesterday at the urging of papa and mama.
until he had to come.
I want to get close to her and sit close to my family
and I'm sure it'll make her even more frightened
but my cousin forced me to join them
they told me a lot and asked a lot of questions
understandably we rarely met and my age is not too much different even though there is an older age than me, they still call me aak
after I think it's enough to gather with them I approached mama and papa near her aak asep really not moving much
I watched as I sat near my mother.I heard her breathing was heavy and she did not dare to look at us at all
" aak asep why do I want to" asked me as if I was stupid I dim my hatred to hurt him at this time
" you are sick sepp" asked mama "if it hurts to treat your child with difficulty "I admit mama is very good
and attention
"at the question it was answered "my papa hit me on the thigh
" from earlier look down mulu her "
" asep her face was lifted" said aak andi who was sitting next to aak asep
I see fitri tea is very anxious to see the state of asep in the middle of us
when my husband came and sat with us
" we want to go home already at 10" said the husband of tea fitri
" it was a night of wak" said fitri tea who sat with us
" hey want to go home not from earlier silent "aak andi hit the shoulder asep
I walked away from that place and regrouped with my cousin