LIFE (Han, Ian, Dina, Ute & Pras)
Ep. 17 Breakup (Han, Ian & Dina Perspective)
...~ HAN ~...
“Panen again good neh bang, happy times I saw Among and Inong us this. succeeded bang I kompori them, so that we this weekend to where brother. Since the inauguration of the young 3 years ago, we have not had time to go to Jatinangor again. I remember also when we came it was my brother was still the most beautiful, brother said not to be a concern, but now he wants to graduate, brother said, surely it's the coolest my brother is now at the school ituh.” cerocos my only beloved sister was on the phone that afternoon. (Among and Inong \= calls to Father and Mother in Batak. Ala is rarely used today, but our parents used to call them so since childhood, because according to them, if not the Batak themselves who preserve this good habit, he said, who else, they really do not want the Batak language lost from civilization.)
I heard the song Poda Nauli by the Elexis Trio (creation of Sakkan Sihombing) singing (which is definitely my sister's job to create a supportive atmosphere to persuade my parents)..
...Hamu amang anakkonhu, Sinuan shoots,...
...Tampukni...
...Bege jo amang hatathon, Huhut pahusor-husor in roham, Hata nauli situtu...
...Naeng si memehononhu tu ho amang,...
...The podahonokku asa adong Bohalmu...
...hasianhu...
...(.(.Translation: O my children,...
...The successor bud, the heart of my heart.....
...Listen to my words, and consider in your heart, Wise words...
...What I'm about to teach you, is shown to you,...
...Which I will advise, so that there is a provision for you my dear son)...
...Burjuhon ma anakhonhu, o tondikku, Na marsingkola i amang...
...Asa juppangmu da amang, Figures and pinarsintama-sintami...
...Ai so adong si lehononhu,...
...Hauma manang...
...Holan marsingkola and boi,...
...Tarbahen au di ho anakhonhu...
...(.(.Well, you my son, oh my soul, seriously attend school if you are my son...
...In order to achieve the ideals as well as my son...
...Because there's nothing I can give you,...
...Good heritage land...
...I only send you what I can do)...
...Did Amang the ingotonmu,...
...Nauli sian au amangmon...
...Pangarokkom and pinangkemi Amang,...
...Tudos ma i holi...
...Hodokhu na di balian i,...
...Tudos ma i tintani...
...Harotas and sinuratmi Amang,...
...Tudos mai huling-hulinghu, Hasianhu's son.....
...(.(.Remember this is my son,...
...This wise advice from your father.....
...That pen you're wearing my son...
...like my bones...
...The sweat that was pouring in the field, that,...
...like the ink of the host...
...The paper you write is like the skin of my body, my beloved son.)...
...***...
“Aish has been boru, give Amangmu this opportunity to talk. Like you're the one who misses your brother.” My father's wrath was heard later, then added (perhaps while scrambling the mobile phone handle of the house from Hanna's hand: "Halak na burju marnatua-old dapotan pasu-pasu sian Debate." (Translation: A good person to parents, will be blessed by God.)
“Horas Handoko, how are you doing son? There is no problem if we come Saturday to Jatinangor?” tanyanya. Clear, solid and straight to the point of discussion, typical Batak fathers in general when talking to their sons.
“Good Among, I will book a stay at the Equator Guest House for you. But sorry I can't seem to pick up to the airport, yes, the agenda is Friday again solid.” My answer then, given that their past arrival could not stay at the Equatorial Guesthouse (the inn in the region of the knight, which is, specially intended for institutional guests and parents who come from far away and need to stay) because it is full.
“Don't book from Friday, we lose later.We are still around in Jakarta first Friday with your Amangboru family, new Saturday morning to our Jatinangor, Jakarta, let Sunday be with us at your school church.” Said Amang again.
“Okey Good Among.” Answer's short.
Then came Inong's voice asking to speak as well and Among also gave a warning that Inong just chatted, not to cry which would eventually interfere with his own health. A few moments later finally came back his voice said with a restrained sob: “Sonang do roham Anak hasianhu?” (Translation: Are you happy?)
“Ea Inong..” I replied slowly. (Translation: Yes mother)
We talked for a long time, but what I remember most is the advice: "Arta na sinari doi, pe satongkin doi. Anakhonhi do hamoraon. Bahenma thyself songon naluas sea, manang songon he pe naroh tungolumu problem, jalo ma dohot roha naserep dohot iman na gogo. Dai ma sude akka na masa da Anak hasianhu." (Translation: Treasures can be sought, appearances are also temporary. My son is a fortune to me. When facing any problem in this life, accept it with a patient heart and strong faith. So enjoy every moment, my favorite child.).
It is difficult to withstand a happy smile mixed with each time exchanging news with this nuclear family. There was only Among, Inong and Hanna, my only little sister whom we pampered a lot. From childhood, attached to this memory, how our small family is indeed very close and inseparable, every morning we always take the time to sit together.
So when I was forced to go to school in this knight, almost every week (can not be every day also because the agenda is quite solid and if you have a conversation, if you have a conversation, it feels like 1 hour will not be enough time) I took the time to video-call for the sake of a little entertaining parents (especially Inong) who are still overwhelmed with a myriad of his tips (local wisdom \= local wisdom) when had time to chat.
At least, the personality of Hanna Aga is similar to Dina, my lovers, they are both equally indifferent and not too affected by the situation and the surrounding conditions, can remain calm in the face of whatever is in front of him. ‘They will definitely fit if the hang-out with my inner’ is soft, feeling a little impatient introducing Dina to them.
...***...
The weekend I was waiting for finally came. This morning my family will come to visit Jatinangor and now I am waiting for their presence in front of the Equator House with Dina, after taking the key, checking the condition and completeness of the room they will use later. We sat facing each other in the front lobby in silence. Dinah with a reading book that never escaped her grasp and I with my HP. Every now and then our gazes intertwine and I never get tired of the pink tinge on her cheeks that are occasionally decorated with dimples.
Already since yesterday I conveyed my family's plan to visit, Dina as usual responded calmly, in silence and seemed not too excited or not too worried, he said, it was me who was a little worried about Dina's acceptance of my family who might be outspoken and what it is.
When the black car entered the courtyard of the Equatorial Guesthouse, we stood together and I approached the car, welcoming them, while Dina remained standing still near the entrance of the guesthouse.
“Horas.. horas.” said Among shortly after opening the car door and immediately shook my hand warmly. Then I was pulled into the arms of Inong who, despite being a little petite, had great strength, tightly hugged my right waist, did not let go even Hanna, my little sister who had now become a young young girl also hugged my left waist.
“Ise i?” tanya Among turned her gaze towards Dina who was smiling sweetly, while folding her palms (looking a book emblazoned there) standing in front of the door of Wisma. His figure seemed to be waiting for us to approach patiently. (Translation: who is it?)
“Hallet”¹ I replied briefly could not help smiling sumringah, when Hanna mischievously said: “Cie..cie.. the na marhallet i.”² (Translation: ¹boyfriend, ²cie who already has a boyfriend)
"Jolo lip nidilat, asa nidok hata!" Straightforward Among responded to the Batak, maybe reprimanding me who was too frontal to answer or Hanna who mocked her brother, (Translation: Lick lips/think first, before speaking)
“Among, Inong and Hanna, this is Dina, Ibana do haholongku na parjolo. Dina, it's Dad, Mom and My Sister, Hanna.” I said introduce them when we're up against. (Translation: she was my first love)
“Horas..” said Dina briefly with a sweet smile and a raised hand greeting.
“Horas.. Horas.. ibotoh ho do marsahap batak at?” asked Amang to Dina who then looked confused did not understand and looked at me for help. (Translation: can speak batak yes?)
“Dina Makassar Among, do not understand him Batak, just to learn Horas aja said earlier.” said while breaking free from Hanna's arms and took the bag from Among's hands, then back said: “Na boratan bag on Among!” try distracting them while directing them to sit on the front porch of their room. (Translation: it's Dad's bag heavy)
“Hallo, I'm Hanna.. Ka’Dina has known Bang Han for a long time?” said Hanna pulled Dina's hand to shake her hand and brought her closer to Inong. Then while winking, he whispered to me: “Slim meat na bang, tabo idaon.” (The body is slim bang, pleasing to the eye)
“Hi Hanna, nice to meet you. I know ka’Han already this year. But if you know closely recently only.” I heard Dina answer before going into the room to put down their bags and rush back out.
“Nak Dina how many brothers? Your mom and dad still there? Where are they staying?” inong asked slowly after sitting down and staring at Dina intensely, looking very interested to know the data of ‘parmaen candidate his’. (Translation: prospective ghost)
“I 3 brothers, Aunt.” replied Dina but soon cut Hanna fast: “Don't call Aunty to Inong Kak, ga fit, call Namboru ajah! If Among, can Ka’Dina call Amangboru.” Hanna said later. (Namboru can also be interpreted as Mother-in-law, usually addressed to the sister of the father and Amangboru is her husband -red)
“Good Hanna, thanks for the information.. My father and mother are still complete Namboru, we live in Gowa Regency, South Sulawesi.” replied Dina remained calm.
“Oh, so where are you guys?” inong asked again, the looks by me Among also showed more attention now. (Translation: church)
Dina who seemed to not understand the question, turned back to face me who was now sitting next to her. Then I was forced to answer: “Dang margaryeja sidea Inongku, halak Ion..” (Translation: their church is not my mother, their religion is Islam)
But a look of surprise and disapproval immediately came out from Among and Inong. Maybe they are against our relationship because they see no future as a result of these differences in beliefs. I don't know, we were only silent for a moment, until finally a junior voice broke this silence.
...***...
...~ IAN ~...
“Good afternoon Brother.” I give ppm to Ka’Han and Ka’Dina who seemed to be sitting with a family on the terrace of one of the rooms in this Equatorial Guesthouse.
This morning, while walking towards a lecturer's house, I saw Ka’Han and Ka’Dina walking in the direction of the Equatorial Guesthouse. So when the Lecturer whom he met was finished asking for his help and then leave a message that his family is now waiting for the presence of Dina (to teach some other Lecturer children who have gathered), without thinking I rushed straight towards the Equatorial Guesthouse, hoping they would still be there.
And it turns out they're still here. But it seems to be in an uncomfortable atmosphere to see the residence created.
“Good afternoon deck.” replied Ka’Han immediately while standing up from his seat and pulling my shoulder, facing me to the family in front of Ka’Dina who was still silent without a smile looking at me at a glance.
“Include Among, Inong, this is Ian, the underclassman who just confirmed to be Young Praja some time ago. The Jakarta Contingent. Ian, this is my father and mother, and the whiny one beside that is my sister, Hanna.” Ka’Han looked in a hurry.
“Good day Father and Mother.and also Hanna.” I said hesitantly, it is not clear what Ka’Han introduced his family to me, although the tip of this eye is slightly enlightened with the cheerful figure of ka’Han's sister, who is very happy, which somehow made me remember the figure of Ute.
“Good day, Ian, from the registration from Jakarta? We were just there last night.. Live in Jakarta where is nak?” Ka’Han's father answered my greeting with a series of questions while allowing me to sit beside him.
“Sorry for a moment sir.” I said to Ka’Han's father. Then back to face Ka’Han and said: “Izin Ka’Han, just now Lecturer Xx looking for Ka’Dina, he said his students are waiting for les.” I said again.
Ka’Dina looked at the wall clock and hurriedly stood up, then said a short goodbye: “Oh almost forgetfulness, sorry Namboru, Amangboru and Hanna, I have to say goodbye first, I have to say no, there is a teaching schedule for several lecturer children in this complex as well. Permission Ka’Han. good afternoon.”.
“Ian please accompany my family for a moment, I anter Dina first yes!” the order of Ka’Han that again confused me and he rushed following Dina's steps without giving me a chance to ask for clarity of command.
While scratching my head that does not itch, I again turned my attention to Ka’Han's parents and tried to remember the question earlier, then replied: “Iyah sir, I was born and raised in Jakarta, Jakarta, applying for this school is also from the Jakarta contingent. My family lives in South Jakarta sir.”
“Abang is not oppa-oppa korea right?” suddenly Hanna who had been sitting beside me asked without hesitation.
“Not, I am Indonesian.” I replied with a pinculum smile. The younger brother of a Ka’Han who always jaim, turned out to be very blunt and have very transparent emotions, I so understand if in the beginning Ka’Han seemed interested in the figure of Ute, I understand if in the beginning Ka’Han seemed interested in the figure of Ute, because his personality is very similar to his sister.
“There really is no Korean, Japanese or Chinese descent at all?” he asked again with an intensity of spirit that did not diminish.
“I am of Chinese descent, but my parents, even my grandparents, are already Indonesian-born. So well, we are Indonesian.” I answered with a smile.
“Oh just know me if there is also a Praja who is of Chinese descent, lest there is a fluffy-bulean crossbreed also bang? Kirain this school is indigenous special.” response Hanna plain.
"Jolo nidilat lips asa nidok hata, asa unang haccit spiritual with you!" Suddenly Ka’Han's father said to Hanna with a little loud, then continued then towards me: “Pardon ya son Ian, Hanna this is a child that we are pampering, so like uncontrolled words due to curiosity.” (Translation: If you want to talk first think so as not to hurt your talking partner)
“Nothing sir, everyone will have the right to argue and have the right to change his opinion. I'm glad someone calls me brother, usually always Big Brother or Sturdy. And I would be even happier if Hanna can start to think of Chinese descent or foreign literature as Indonesian too, even though we are not indigenous.” I said later.
Hanna's face looked flushed and she then said: “Sorry yes bang if Hanna just talked about it earlier.” while lowering her face, looks very cute.
“Dad Hanna, thank you for calling me brother.. By the way, what is Hanna's ideal? Interested in following in the footsteps of Ka’Han?” I said later, trying to shift the conversation.
“Still labile him son.” replied si-Dad turned to the Mother with a mocking smile but wrapped in affection, who had been seen just silently observing, then the Mother finally said: “When I was a kid, I was first invited to board a plane, I wanted to be a flight attendant, then I wanted to be a pilot. In SD sepet sepet sepet be a small doctor trus said his ideals will later become a doctor. But when Junior High, his school was joined by a Fire Department group for a disaster response demo, he changed course, wanted to become a Fire Department member as well. Lately the transmission of his friends K-Pop fever, so like nari and he said he wanted to be a dancer. Maybe I'll see Ian in a minute, go to this school as well as him.. So are you mine?” (boru \= call for girls batak)
“Ish, Inong is the most good at making fun of him in front of others. Like the times make a shame. later if the drill is not practicable, new nyesel.” replied Hanna with a face as bright as a boiled crab while entering in his mother's arms, as if to hide his shame.
“Ach, it's not hard to seem to find a mate for you, even this girl can be forced into your partner if you want Hanna.. Yes ‘nak Ian?” she said while joking towards me.
‘Such a happy family’ my inner nelangsa, considering my own family who has always been full of demands for perfection. (Translation: what a happy family)
“Looks not to be forced bu..” replied me kalem responded with deheman father Ka’Han.
“Apaan seh? Kog you guys can suddenly compact like this seh? This can be in the category of bullying. Udah ach, I want to go to the toilet ajah.” said Hanna then while going into the room, maybe because I really feel embarrassed.
Then Ka’Han's father faced me and again asked me some questions: “How many brothers want this Ian? Your mom and dad still there? Where to stay in your South Jakarta?” maybe it will be connected with a series of other questions, if only we did not see the figure of Ka’Han entering the guesthouse and walking towards us.
“Thank you Ian for accompanying my family.. uh, Hanna where?” tanya Ka’Han.
“It seems to go to the toilet Brother. I am grateful, can get to know the family brother. Permission if I can say back to ksatrian, soon apple time release cruise sak.” I said with enough know myself.
“Okey” replied Ka’Han briefly.
“Eh, ‘nak Ian won't come out to eat with us later?” ask Ka’Han's mother.
I also looked at Ka’Han whose face looked a little wrinkled and immediately replied: “I'm sorry mom, I still have another enterprising. Thanks for the offer. Excuse me Mom and Dad.. Happy Afternoon Ka’Han” said while giving ppm and passing soon. Sayup heard the conversation Ka’Han and his parents in a language I did not understand.
...***...
...~ DINA ~...
This is my first time fighting with Ka’Han. Our love is still relatively corn-sized, so far it looks fine, although it is in a silent mode alias without the knowledge of many others, only a few people who might know it, such as Ka’Pras, although it is in a silent mode, Ute and probably Ian.
It crossed my mind, the advice of the area that his parents had told him several times:
“Pangaderengnge temmakkullei sia riappassan apa' lanro alenai arajangnge. At toisa temmakkulleni risui' matae risappe' daucculie, riteppe' lilae enrenge aje nariabbeyang.”
(Translation: The custom cannot be enforced, for it is the body of great power. It is the same as not possible to be gouged out of the eye, cut off the earlobe, cut off the tongue and feet and then discarded.)
The fleeting experience of meeting the Ka’Han family, really opened my eyes and heart. That not everything we want can be in line with expectations.
Ka’Han and I are really from two different, almost identical worlds.
The Ka’Han family is a harmonious family with values that are almost in line with the values that my family adheres to. Such as: respecting parents, prioritizing togetherness, avoiding the use of harsh words and so on.
Our family both uphold the norm of trust that we have been imitating. We are also equally covered with thick customary customs. The unfortunate thing is that even though our beliefs and customs have been very strongly rooted in each of us, our beliefs and customs are not the same (very different from each other) and it is almost impossible to align them.
One thing I believe, even if we have been in contact with the road, but that does not mean we must always be in line. And based on this reality, I gave up, while Ka’Han insisted on fighting for it.
...***...
“Ka, if about this one how to solve it?” the tiny sound and pull on the side of my clothes scattered the thoughts that were entrenched after the breakup with Ka’Han. He had time to pursue and deliver me in silence to the front of the lecturer's house where I taught tutoring.
“Oh is almost the same as the previous matter of the deck, see yes brother exemplify again. if this one is moved here, then the value will be..” My concentration has returned to the small creatures who need my guidance to complete PR and the deepening of their subject matter.
Then without feeling 2 hours had passed and it was time I returned to the guesthouse, rested.
“Bu, the study time is over, I say back to the guesthouse first yes ma'am.” my farewell to the inside of the house, aimed at the wife of the lecturer where I teach the invisible stems.
“It's done yes Dina, thank you son, sorry mom did not anter to the outside ya neng, not yet kelar thisih cooking.” sahut the owner of the house from the kitchen.
“It's okay mom, Assalamualaikum.” I replied again.
“Waalaikumsalam Warahmatullahi Westarakatuh.” heard again sahutan si-moms.
“See you again next week sisters, Assalamualaikum.” to my students who are still tidying up their books, waving to them.
“Waalaikumsalam" they answered compactly.
...***...
“Have finished teaching him?” a melodious voice that quite often fills my days these days, is heard greeting me from the front porch while wearing my PDH shoes.
“Newly Brother. I think Ka’Han will accompany the family of my sister all day.” I said softly and stopped the continuation of my sentence in order to see the look of his face that was a bit stiff without a smile.
“They are resting. Later in the afternoon before evening we will come out again, for dinner, you are welcome to join if you would like to join.” said Ka’Han hesitate.
“I do not want to ruin the atmosphere of family intimacy that is kangen-kangen Kak.” replied I quite know myself.
“Dina, we need to talk seriously.” Finally the sentence came out as well, I'm just thankful I didn't start this conversation. It feels too painful and heavy for those who start it.
“It seems like there is nothing to discuss anymore Brother, we just need to agree on a thing.” I said trying to calm myself. ‘Don't cry Dina, don't add burden for this good personMy inner’ is sad looking down deeper and deeper.
“I don't want to agree on anything nuanced Dina's farewell. This is my first love and I hope it will be my last. Please don't give up too easily!” ka’Han said hard and forced me to allow this look to his very clear face. This was the first time I saw that expression printed on his face.
We deliberately walked slowly and took a detour from the lecturer's house to the guesthouse where I lived, passing the front of the Hospital Dormitory Clinic (KSA) Ksatrian who was quiet, and the, in order to be able to talk longer and quiet, because it is relatively minimal from greetings and other government views.
“I'm sorry Brother, but a relationship should be based on balance and equivalence. At the beginning of the relationship we have agreed, if we will live it well and if at any time felt there will be more harm than benefit, we will review the continuation of this relationship.” Finally I can say this sentence even with a voice that is choked.
To be honest, the affection and comfort with a Ka’Han some time lately has been so I enjoy. During this not-too-distant time, Ka’Han has been so attentive, patient and fulfilling all my requests and needs without saying much. This farewell will leave a wound in my heart, but I must be strong, I do not want to be the source of trouble between Ka’Han and his very dear family. The burden is too heavy.
“Please don't say it like without feeling Dina. Our relationship is not a business that needs to be negotiated. This love is not a shame that can be revoked at any time for the good of the plant. We can still fight together. Think of this as a test of our love. If we graduate, then our love will rise to class. Don't give up this easily Dina, please.” Ka’Han words get stifling this chest.
“Once again I apologize Brother. I just saw we would end up hating each other if this relationship continued. There are too many barriers and differences between us. Please do not impose your will and let us make peace with the circumstances. I won't blame anyone and I hope Ka’Han doesn't blame anyone either. I'm happy to know and be known Ka’Han. Let us part in this happiness, O sister.” without feeling my tears have dripped, flowing without a sound and I throw this face, trying to dispel the next droplets.
We walk in silence now. In each one's thoughts. And without feeling the area of the women's homestead is in sight. By ogre I said: “Izin me first ka, good afternoon.” with ppm I passed.
...***...