Broken Mind Eric's Diary
New Year's eve

...

It's getting dark.

Tomorrow we will change the year.

I just sat pensively, lamenting the fate of my precious legs. Last year, I was able to celebrate New Year's Eve in London. Now to go to the restroom alone trouble. Ah. fate is fate.

Even so, just having Juyeon and Hyunjae is enough for me.

"What you've been doing all day. Still hugging Younghoon's pillow?".

Hyunjae with his moth mouth always managed to sting my mood. His cold face made him look unfriendly, even though he was a very considerate person.

Juyeon can only laugh at me. He said, "Eric, when did you stop making trouble?"

Hoonie~

They're both very bad, aren't they. It'll all be easier if you're here. You've always been my shield and my cloak when they both bullied me. Hehe.

I told them, about the arrival of a person named Haruto. The way I spoke was very excited, but Juyeon and Hyunjae instead gave a reaction that I did not want to see.

What is this, did they know about Haru.

"So it's just me, who doesn't know?"

"Not only Younghoon, I am also quite close to Haruto. We are home schooling here. If only he also entered Junior High outside the city, maybe we would be friends until now. Like you two."

"So you guys got back together, when you went to high school?"

If you knew Hoonie, Hyunjae's long explanation made me even more jealous of Haruto.

But I still did not know myself, and felt I was the only one who was the winner among them.

For the first time since you left, I was so excited to tell a story. And I'm sure, Hyunjae and Juyeon also saw my current change. It was all thanks to the arrival of this child.

For that, they both asked me to make sure Haru came back here later tonight. But how, we haven't even had time to exchange mobile numbers.

The only media that can connect to it is only the chat room in the game earlier. Really troublesome.

A few hours later, Haru actually came over while bringing me Dakkochi. He even bought it two portions. It's too much, when I told you there was no need.

In addition to coming to meet my requirements, she also accepted Hyunjae's invitation to spend the new year's night with us.

Which was comfortable, I became a little jealous of Haru. Just because you knew him first, compared to the one I met a few years ago.

Maybe I'm childish, but somehow it doesn't feel like I'm willing. Maybe there's something I don't know yet, about your closeness in the past.

"You want to go to the rooftop?"

The question in a polite tone, made me think back to you.

Right now we were just the two of us in the living room, while Hyunjae and Juyeon roasted corn and BBQ upstairs.

I looked out the window, it must have been very cold out there especially in the rooftop on the third floor.

However, suddenly a hand opened before me, as if waiting for me to welcome and reach him.

"If you want, I'll get you to the rooftop."

As invited.

Instead of reaching for her hand, I would rather have my arm around her shoulder. It will be more comfortable when I help me step up.

Not only did he pick me up the stairs, but he also completely kept my body from losing balance.

And for the first time, I parted with your pillow Hoonie.

With an exhausting struggle, we finally arrived at the third floor, precisely in the rooftop. Both Hyunjae and Juyeon lovebirds are busy with their respective skills. One was flipping grilled corn over the fireplace, and one was seasoning a BBQ. Just by smelling the food I was hungry.

I just sat on the padded bean-bag, opening the suspicious package inside the plastic bag.

"Damn, what is this?"

I opened the package and pulled something out of it. A firework ready to be lit.

"You crazy, this is the thing that Brother Jihye forbade!"

I thrust the object towards Juyeon's feet not far away standing near me. I also pointed it towards Hyunjae.

"Hyunjae said, just watching will not be exciting. It'd be better if we also set off fireworks."

"I just said it like that. I didn't tell you to buy it!"

As usual, the two astral beings could only blame each other.

How not, the object that erupted when shot into the sky is forbidden by Brother Jihye. This is one of the reasons, which makes you tormented at the beginning of the previous new year.

This year I feel for myself, how you can't walk on both feet. It'll definitely be a bad memory, one you've been through.

Haaa....

But because it's just sprained, I hope next week my left leg can be used for walking. And I can run again in the green field. Hehe.

The longer I stayed outside, the wind that blew even more pierced into the bone. You know, that I can't stand cold air. I want to go back to my room and sleep under my blanket.

Waitaminute! Where did I leave your pillow?

I just remembered, I kept your pillow on the couch in the living room, that's a long way to go if I had to pick it up here. I could have left that sacred thing in any place.

It felt like I would be scolded, if I asked one of the astral beings for help, who was busy preparing the obligatory meal this new year's night.

Haru was busy chatting with Hyunjae on the other end, only he I could ask for help. But apparently, I shouldn't look spoiled in front of the person I just met.

To avoid all those worries, I finally decided to fight alone, going down each rung of stairs with this one leg of mine. This is all for the sake of picking up your sacred pillow Hoonie.

Not yet in the middle room, my legs have started to feel sore. Just a few more steps, my steps reached the second floor. I can no longer afford to jump one floor into the living room.

All I can do right now, is just sit on the couch breathing. Not forgetting that I also massaged my right leg, he had worked hard to hold my body weight alone.

In addition, I also occasionally exchanged chats with a friend in a chat room in a game. We've never met, but I'm sure he'll recognize me right away when we meet someday. It's because I'm the opposite of you, noisy and very active.

"Why are you here?"

Haru's sudden voice came, making my heart almost jump out. Damn he held back a laugh when he found out, lost I was shocked to death.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going down?"

"I'm not strong, it's cold outside."

How could I have been blunt for wanting to take your pillow. It's Hoonie.

"But you can ask me for help, right. You're not feeling well because I'm talking to Hyunjae? We're not that serious, so call me next time!"

Huh huh?

I froze for a split second. How come, the person I just met this afternoon gave me the attention you always gave me.

What, now, have I found you out of someone else?

Why not, every time I see him I always see your figure in him. Are you trying to bring us together, because he looks like you?

Are you trying to cheer me up through this guy?

Suddenly the sound of fireworks from the direction of the rooftop, began to be shot into the sky above. Whether my heart is starting to weaken, or my mind is in turmoil, it feels like lately I often experience jump scare.

"Basic Hyunjae-Juyeon shit!!"

I can only curse no matter who is in front of me right now. He was laughing at my reaction at the moment.

Fireworks are starting to burn everywhere. That means that today has entered the first date, the first month at the beginning of the new year.

"Good new year Eric."

It's the first time in my life, spending the twinkling of the new year with a stranger. Besides, I also received a new year's wish from him personally.

Maybe you think it'll be a memory?

No Hoonie. For me there will be no more moments that I have to remember without you in them. Plus because right now, I feel sorry for Hyunjae and Juyeon. They could have set off fireworks over this house.

After some time, the two astral beings finally went down to the second floor, while carrying the dish they had prepared.

I wanted to curse at them, but all that was lost when I saw their two laughing and happy faces.

That laugh, I haven't seen her since you left. You could say this is a new beginning for us. Start a new life without you.

Highlight Hyunjae's eyes while eating me, already describing everything. He's been the one who's been hurt the most and lost the most, but I'm sure he'll try to forget the pain of last year. Without forgetting his memories.

Hoonie's pillow finally returned to my arms. Juyeon was the most understanding and brought it to me.

Actually, he came down to the first floor just to bring the cutlery in the kitchen, but seeing your pillow that I used to hug, he brought it to the second floor.

That night we ate together.

Our seating position has never changed in the past. Although the owner is no longer there, but the position on my right is always vacated. Now I fill it with pillows, hehe.

To my left sat an athletic man who often mocked me, who else if not Juyeon the jailer. Next to him sat a tall man, who was good at slashing people with his poisonous mouth. That's Hyunjae the julid.

And next to him, now sits a handsome man with a white face as pale as a vampire. Haruto, for the time being I called him a duplicate because his attitude is very similar to yours.

After all the food we spent together, and the rest of the dirty dishes were also being cleaned by Juyeon and Haru in the kitchen.

Hyunjae sat down towards me.

"What do you think. His attitude isn't very similar to our Younghoon?"

I just nodded in response to Hyunjae's question. Her eyes were glazed as if ready to shed her tears out.

"Haruto told me he didn't come to take the place of the deceased. So we don't have to bother trying to accept it. I felt bad when I heard those words. Though he has a special place in Younghoon's life."

Hyunjae's tears finally trickled down as well. I tried to wipe her wet cheek, but she hurriedly wiped it herself.

"He came here for you."

"Why me?"

Hyunjae did not reply, he just gave that expensive smile to me.

I don't understand what he just said. Clearly, I wouldn't be that close to Haru just because he looks like you Hoonie.

Hyunjae hurriedly went to prepare the bed for us, either to hide so that no one could see him crying.

Even in the middle of the night, when we fell asleep Hyunjae cried a mouthful. I woke up hearing his voice. When I opened my eyes, there was Juyeon by his side who was trying to calm Hyunjae down.

I know it's very hard for him, it's Hyunjae's first year without you. Last year he was like this when you went to London, but this time it was different. It must have hurt and hurt as if an arrow was stuck in his chest. Even if the arrow was plucked, there would definitely be a gaping hole and it was very difficult to remove.

Your departure was very hard for us. Sometimes we are calm, but there are times when we miss your presence.

Maybe this makes it hard for us to accept your departure, because almost every day you fill our days with memories.

Even if we are far apart, you always take the time to just give news or send magic words as encouragement.

*Hoonie~

We missed you*.

.

.

...----------------...