CARNATION (KIARA)
SUPPOSING

"Can I ask you something?"

In the middle - the middle of the conversation arrived - Hendra suddenly ventured to say this to Kiara.

"Just tell Hen."

Long enough Hendra was silent before finally speaking.

"Are you going to be like this forever Kiara?"

Deg

The question from Hendra now made Kiara speechless.

"What do you mean by Hendra?"

"Yes I asked you until when will you be the sole master of Helen?"

Now Hendra seriously said that to Kiara.

"Either Hen, I don't know, until when I'll be in my status like this."

"Are you comfortable with what you're doing right now Kiara?"

Kiara frowned when Hendra asked.

"Comfortable? is comfort so important, Hen?"

Kiara said that while stirring - stirring the iced coffee that is currently in front of her.

"Yes to me one of the factors why someone needs a partner because he wants to fill the void of his heart."

"Then what about the people who chose to close the emptiness of his heart, Hen? what if in the end they don't become empty they don't deserve a life partner either?"

Hendra was speechless with all the words from Kiara.

"I know right now maybe you'll say that to Kiara, but that's if you're thinking from one side only about how you feel, but have you ever thought about Helen's side?"

Deg

For the umpteenth time Kiara was silent again, indeed all this time Kiara never talked about this with Helen, Kiara never asked Helen, whether she was lacking affection or not.

."Kiara even though we've known her for a long time and to me you're an amazing woman, but on one hand until now I still do not know what makes you close the heart is very heavy."

"And I would never force someone to open up if they didn't want to open up."

"However, it would be nice for you not only to think from your side, invite Helen to discuss this issue as well, Helen is old enough to be able to be invited to discuss what she really wants."

"I understand Hendra thanks for every suggestion you make, I'll think of all the things you've said."

Hendra who saw Kiara smile now laughed again, indeed tonight is a night filled with joy from both sides who are currently trying to eliminate fatigue in every job.

"Dear - Hen's day, thank you for driving me home."

Kiara said that when Hendra's car had entered the yard of his tiny house.

"Definitely Kiara, good night greetings to Helen."

After saying that Kiara got out of the car and let Hendra's car disappear from her eyes.

"Hen, if you know all the truth, then you'll understand why until now I've chosen to remain alone."

"Not all men want to accept my past, not all men want to have an ex-convict wife, right?."

With a sad heart Kiara said that, aware of every thing that has ever passed Kiara chose to remain alone until now.

"A handsome doctor like you would never experience a situation like this Hen."

Kiara said this while looking at the beautiful night that witnessed their friendship.

With a slow step Kiara took the key out of the bag and opened the tiny house she bought from the hard results of becoming a writer of platform novels.

Once inside the house Kiara saw a house that was a little mess because since the morning he left the house no one cleaned the house.

"Helen must still be angry with me, the house is still a mess and she's not willing to help at all."

Kiara said this slowly while looking at the pile of dirty dishes and food marks on the dining table.

Soon Kiara put down her briefcase, then rolled up her sleeves and washed the dirty dishes piled up in the dishwasher.

"Well, son, Helen must still be angry with my mother so that Helen would not help her at all."

"God why until now I couldn't be strict with Helen at all? am I like that because of the deep guilt of my past?"

Kiara muttered as she continued to wash the dishes - dirty dishes with both hands.

During this time Kiara had never been angry at Helen at all, the deep guilt that made Kiara like that towards the daughter she loved the most.

"Is this good for Helen the Lord? is it with my upbringing that never gives a reprimand for every single thing he would do good for him in the future."

As Kiara's tears flowed again, Kiara cried again without a sound and continued to do household chores despite the late night.

"Sometimes you'll understand why it's like this, baby, mommy just. I hope that when you grow up, you can still see you."

Tears that continue to flow now began to be removed by Kiara, a broom and washcloth that was in his two hands made him realize that the work done at this time was not finished.

Still with her work clothes that have not been changed since this morning, tonight Kiara cleaned up the house she bought with installments every month.

After cleaning the house, Kiara went into the room and cleaned her body in the bathroom.

The loneliness that has now become a sidekick from Kiara makes it easily adaptable.

The tears he had wearyed out made him friendly to all the blasphemy that he sometimes still received when he learned that he was an ex-convict.

"Darling as usual when you got home you must have slept."

Kiara who had finished bathing went straight to Helen's room and once opened the door Kiara saw her daughter was already asleep very soundly.

Kiara slowly walked into her daughter's room, now a teenager.

Kiara saw some of the walls in the room decorated with photos of Helen and also some photos of Helen and her friends.

Kiara's two eyes were fixed on a diary lying on the dresser beside Helen's bed and Kiara quickly sat down and stared at the diary.