[Silver Ash] - Become The Strongest In Another World

[Silver Ash] - Become The Strongest In Another World
CHAPTER 319: The Expressions of a Bad Heart


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"I thought you were here."


Tania's voice suddenly appeared, making Noelle instantly turn her eyes to him.


Noelle did not reply as she saw Tania jump to where she is now.


Currently, Noelle was sitting on one of the ruins in the capital area. The ruins were like they were fresh, as if all those terrible events had just happened yesterday.


Staring back at the night sky that felt quieter than usual, Noelle suddenly said, "It's really confusing."


He no longer knew where to find the last frog. There were no clues, so Noelle really had to think about it from the start.


It may be made difficult to test whether Noelle is really the one who was in the Queen of Bengal's prophecy or not. Noelle herself began to doubt him.


Noelle then heard Tania's light footsteps, and without her attention, Tania was already sitting right beside her.


"This place used to be an observation tower. I found some things that look like telescopes. Do you want to try it? "


At this moment, Noelle already did not know what to say to Tania. He just took out a random topic that was in his head.


However, Tania shook her head.


"We can try it later. For now, I just want to sit quietly beside you."


"That's words you shouldn't say carelessly" Noelle said after she let out a sigh of resignation.


Tania did not respond, only hugging her own knees as she looked up at the sky with Noelle.


The silence lasted for several minutes, until finally, Tania decided to destroy it.


"While you do not believe in the prophecy, you still act to fulfill it. Actually, what do you want? "


Tania knew that Noelle did not believe in prophecy at all. But, all Noelle's actions so far successfully made him confused. What exactly was Noelle's goal?


Although it was not shown by her expression, Tania's question mark-filled gaze was enough to tell Noelle that she was curious.


At first, it was a question Noelle could not answer. But now, everything is different. He had already prepared the answer to this question.


Rudra had already asked him almost the same thing, but back then Noelle had relied on logic to answer. And somehow he couldn't use that logic to answer Tania's question.


Talking honestly was hard for Noelle, so she was afraid it would be a little awkward. But, there was no point in worrying about that now.


"I. .. just don't want to disappoint them."


He no longer wanted to betray the hope that someone had placed on him. And for that, he should try his best to make their hopes come true.


"Before we meet again in the capital .. Do you remember what happened? "


Tania nodded. "The gate to the underworld opens, and we fight together. After that .. I don't remember anything, but Navi said that I managed to escape the last incident."


Noelle herself only remembered vaguely. At that time his condition was so bad that his consciousness almost disappeared, and he was also on the verge of losing control thanks to drinking the dirty blood of the puppets and Noir who kept suppressing his consciousness.


At that time, Noelle remembered that Tania had fought with him, albeit with a very different 'mood.


But, that's not the subject of Noelle's discussion this time.


"Do you remember how I changed my identity for the first time? "


Tania nodded immediately. "You told everyone at the Asterisk."


Noelle grunting. "That's right. It was the first time I had lived with a completely foreign identity, an identity I had never been born with."


Noah Ashrain's. At first, it was nothing more than a random name that he made for his new identity. He also creates that new identity to keep Olivia and the others out of Noir's reach.


In the beginning, it was nothing more than an identity he used to protect what was precious to him.


However, as time went on, the concept began to change. This new identity began to deviate from the original purpose of its creation.


Noelle felt many things for the first time with this identity. One of the things he got, was the experience of being given responsibility and trust by those he just knew.


"When I became Noah Ashrain, I joined the church organization, the Lunatic Order. I was able to join thanks to a letter I got from an acquaintance. There, I finally got to know them."


Dolf, Tian, Louen, Dexter, Rita, Mona, and Felice. Besides them, there was also Old Yode, an old man who became an outside member of the organization—people who became part of the organization, but were not bound in it.


Noelle then took out a pocket watch that she still kept to this day. It was a pocket watch that became a mark of his membership in the Nautica bar. Created by Old Yode at Dolf's request.


"I don't plan on having a deep relationship with them, because from the beginning my goal was just to hide while gathering information. But ... It's clear that things won't go that easy."


Noelle's participation in the Lunatic Order was precisely a sign of the start of a series of events that then brought the Nautica bar to their 'destruction.


Noelle's involvement in the Feran Cerces case was really the cause of all this.


Indeed, it is not really his fault, because since the beginning of the church has indeed targeted Feran Cerces who are part of the Swallow Life Order. But still, Noelle could not forgive the coincidence.


Thanks to the information he provided, Dolf and the Lunatic Order's intelligence team managed to find traces of the movements of the Swallow Life Order members, which then led them to the 'last fight', after which', where there are many people who are victims.


"After further thought, perhaps my biggest mistake was luring everyone into the enemy's plans."


Because if it was not planned, there was no way the reinforcements from the Hermit Cult could come in time.


"Everybody in Nautica's bar should think of me as a stranger. But, they actually accepted me well without the slightest bit of suspicion."


It was a strange feeling for Noelle.


"After the fight was over, I met Louen at Rita's grave."


"And that's where you start to feel it" Tania continued.


Noelle nodded, confirming Tania's words.


"She told me about her past, and she also said that she was leaving soon. That should be the end, but …."


Noelle squeezed tightly into the pocket watch she had in her right hand, but she held back her power to keep it from breaking.


"Before he left, he was pinning his hopes on me, so that I could be together and protect everyone, in his place."


Louen pinned that hope on the wrong person. Noelle was not a permanent member, but only a 'jumping flea' who stayed for a while, then left immediately after his goal was achieved.


"Louen was wrong for pinning his hopes on me, but on the other hand I was also wrong for being a decent person in his eyes."


If Noelle had been a more unworthy person, Louen would have pinned her hopes on Dexter, not Noelle.


"I couldn't stay with them much longer, so .. I planned my departure shortly after Louen disappeared without word."


In the end, only Noelle knew where and what Louen was going for.


"What did you do to get away from them? "


Tania had absolutely no idea about this story. With a face and eyes filled with interest, she looked at Noelle who was beside her.


In response to that, Noelle's honest reaction was a forced smile.


"After everything that happened, the church began to place suspicion on me, which is why I couldn't leave in a normal way. So ... I chose to fake my death."


It was the second time Noelle had faked the death of her identity. The first as Noelle, and the second as Noah Ashrain.


The revelation certainly took Tania by surprise. She widened her eyes with her mouth slightly open, completely unexpected of the answer Noelle gave.


"But it …."


Tania wanted to say something, but Noelle interrupted, "I crushed Louen's last hope. I can't be with them, let alone protect with all my strength. What I did was escape without shame."


Noelle narrowed her eyes, had a mocking look and was extremely disgusted to herself.


It was a sin that would haunt him to any moment. The sin he got from disappointing the good wishes of someone who charged at him.


Noelle did not want to repeat the same sin twice. He had already trampled on Louen's expectations, and he was already unwilling to do so.


Therefore, Noelle decided to fight for the great hope that the Artof tribe placed on her.


"To be honest, I don't care about the Artof tribe at all. But, seeing their loyalty towards the Bengis Queen made me think twice. They all have the same hope, which is to free the Queen of Bengal from her seal. That's an incredible hope."


Noelle sighed for a moment, then continued.


"And when they pinned that hope on me, I thought that I could make this a form of atonement for my mistakes that ruined Louen's expectations and hopes."


Noelle's eyes were getting darker. He stared at the ruins of the capital with self-deprecating eyes. Beside her, Tania did nothing but listen to all of Noelle's honest complaints.


"In the end, I was just looking for an excuse to correct my mistake."


Noelle did not want to repeat the same regret. He did not want to disappoint anyone this time. Thinking about how Louen reacted when she found out what Noelle was doing, honestly scared Noelle.


In fact, Noelle wouldn't be surprised if Louen hated her so much right now. He won't deny that. Instead, Noelle will accept it and honestly confess that she is the one at fault.


"My old self never thought about it, but .. disappointing someone's expectations is really a painful thing."


It was not usual for Noelle to express her thoughts and heart honestly like this. Even he himself was shocked, but it was fine, everything would be fine. He will find a solution to this problem.


Noelle looked up at the sky, and began to estimate the shape of the constellations.


The sky looks beautiful. Maybe he'll pick up the former telescope later.


Tania who was still beside him still did not say anything. She only smiled gently, leaning her head on Noelle's shoulder with a warm and happy feeling of covering her.


Tania thought that it would be best if this feeling could be shared with Noelle.


"You did the right thing."


In the end, that was all Tania could say. He did not know if the feelings he wanted to share were really conveyed. But at least, he hoped so.


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