Beautiful Monster
Reciprocal

"So he said he didn't care!"

Ignacia did not pay much attention to Nesya's annoyance. The girl refocused on her comics after a few seconds. What Ignacia is doing now is just staring at Rajendra who is joking with friends that Ignacia does not know.

"Everything in this world is reciprocal?" Ignacia.

Slowly she positioned herself to feel more comfortable. Put yourself to bed at the table with both hands. The look in his eyes could not be separated from Rajendra. The question got a small nod from Nesya. The glasses girl did not want to mess up her focus on comics.

"You think Rajendra made those new girlfriends because I used to have a boy friend?" Ignacia looked at the man outside. It felt like his heart had really gotten carried away and settled for him. Nesya could feel it from the tone of the friend.

"What are you talking about? Don't you already know the answer? Why ask that?"

"I feel like Rajendra is like this because I used to be friends with men. He's my neighbor, a good friend. So I thought Rajendra was like this because of me. Now Rajendra also has a close friend."

"You're just weird, Ignacia. Maybe it's just your feelings. After all, people must have a gender-different friend who is familiar. I don't think it has anything to do with."

"But" Ignacia answered quickly, "Rajendra had a close female friend after the close male friend of mine left. I mean after she moved house. Rajendra then gets closer to his female friends."

"That's probably just your feeling, Ignacia."

...*****...

"Ignacia," someone called.

Rajendra walked closer. His eyes were fixed only on the lover while his smile expanded for no reason. His smile fed Ignacia up.

"Let's go home together" she asked.

Nesya pulled over for a moment. Prefer to walk first so as not to disturb his friend who is kasmaran. He also wanted to make room for Ignacia to recover her mood after feeling sad since noon.

"Something happened?" Rajendra asked.

His head he brought closer to Ignacia so that there was no need to speak in a normal tone. There may be sensitive things that they do not want to listen to Nesya that are in a few steps from both.

"Nothing," Ignacia answered briefly.

As usual, he would not be able to stare at Rajendra who was so close to him. This is the man who always misses him. Why is it so hard to look at her and look at her?

Does it have anything to do with what happened this afternoon?

Rajendra improved his walking position. No longer bring himself close to the beloved. With one hand carrying a laptop bag, he walked lightly as Ignacia was with him.

"Your actions don't show that there's nothing. Come on, just tell me. Or just send a message?"

Ignacia is sick of having to send messages. It was already missing the small gift he had always wanted. A short message from Rajendra rarely came and only kept Ignacia waiting.

"I'm just tired."

"When why? It's been a hard day, Ignacia?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Nesya turned her head because of her friend's weak answer. Got Rajendra sending the code as if asking what was going on with Ignacia so that it could be this sad. Nesya did not want to interfere and only returned to looking ahead. Let Ignacia say it herself.

Rajendra took his cell phone out of his pocket, wrote something down there. Afterwards his phone was saved and walked beside his lover without any conversation. Both are too busy with their emotions.

...*****...

...Rajendra ⁇ ◝ ⁇ ◜...

| Let's meet if you have time

Ignacia put her phone on the nightstand after reading Rajendra's message without intending to reply. Maybe his bad thoughts about the reciprocity between Rajendra and his past are too burdensome. Ignacia can see Bahri and herself in the past when she sees Rajendra with her friend.

Laugh together, share a joke, and maybe call each other to ask something. But either Rajendra becomes the first person a girl friend like Bahri needs information from Ignacia or not. If so, they will become more and more similar.

"Why are you jealous, Ignacia? People from organizations always have a lot of friends. Whether it was a woman or a man," Ignacia spoke to herself. Staring at her disheveled face through the glass on her dresser.

"Rajendra has been with his girlfriends a lot, why should you care and think silly? You'll just look exaggerated in Rajendra's eyes."

Ignacia felt that she should tell someone to make her relieved. But Nesya or her mother is not the right person for that. While Athira may not understand anything about his feelings that he has never felt. Who can he tell you now?

Ignacia glanced at her phone that was on top of the nightstand. Grab it slowly and type something there. A message for someone who might lighten his load.

^^^I don't like to see Rajendra |^^^

^^^With other women |^^^

^^^That's normal? |^^^

Message sent. Takes time until the owner of the number can reply.

| You came directly to ask

| Yes of course it's normal

| That's called jealousy

| Tumben once you're jealous

^^^Rajendra joked with his female friend |^^^

^^^Yes meksipun there are also many male friends |^^^

^^^ You know what I mean, right? |^^^

| Yes, I know

| Rajendra Doesn't look like a crocodile

| Why are you worried?

^^^I'm not worried about itu |^^^

^^^Only I feel far away |^^^

| Then draw his attention again

| With everything you can do

^^^Included her? |^^^

| I'll be back on school holidays

Suddenly the topic changed. Ignacia stared at the strange message that had just come in earlier. Why would he say such a thing to Ignacia? As if they would meet.

...*****...

Testing again. Who writes, online, also practices again. Ignacia is sick of everything. But luckily after all this, just need to face the graduation exam and he will be able to break free from the curse of the last year's student forever. The most exciting thing starts here. University entrance exam and running for invitation letter.

Ignacia spent a lot of time resting by reading a novel, as a stress reliever. Meanwhile Rajendra is busy with his friends in order to face all the exams. Friends ambis is the term. So he would rarely contact or even meet with Ignacia for their sake.

Rajendra is so common. Ignacia isn't that important to him anyway, is it? Ignacia is not as good at counting as Rajendra's friends. Even in the language itself, it is not perfect. Be self-conscious Ignacia and draw her conclusions.

Rajendra needs a more skilled man.

"Sister," someone called. Unique little voice. Sounds like Arvin's voice. "Let's get ready. We eat out. Our father said we'd be gone in twenty minutes."

Something from Arvin's words knocked over Ignacia's head abruptly. Tumben once his father invited him to eat out when this was not the weekend. Usually the family will only eat out if it is before the holiday or on the weekend so as not to need to wash a lot of dishes.

"Is today a special day?" Ignacia. He moved to get ready to leave.

In the car, only Rafka and Arvin fill the void. They have a story that must be heard by both people. Rafka told me about what he saw on the video app about making things while Arvin told me about his friends playing chases.

I listened carefully while driving. Splitting the focus is easy. But at least it can be done because now it has a lot of heads. Then on the other hand, her mother joked with her two sons. Keep responding as if their story is interesting.

This conversation made Ignacia envious. His two younger siblings had many stories with laughs while all he had was a sad story about his tired feelings. Her romance with Rajendra is not so colorful and her school chapter is sickening. Very unfortunate.

When I got to the restaurant, Ignacia, Athira, and the mother ordered. Let the three men in this family pick the table. Hope you get a good table. This place is quite crowded even though it is not a weekend.

"I heard from my father" Athira whispered while her mother ordered food, "today we ate outside because my sister looked stressed. I want to make my last months at home more fun."

"Sounds like I'm not my father" joked Ignacia.

"Dad also said that this was worth what you did at school. As a stress reliever like the books you read too."

"Is that so?"

...*****...

Ignacia was waiting on a park bench. He said the person who made the appointment with him will be here any minute. That was fifteen minutes ago.

"Is he still busy with his friends? Then why did you agree to my invitation?" Ignacia.

"Is it because I used to prefer Bahri over Rajendra? When he bought me that drink." Ignacia leaned her body against the back of the garden chair. Staring at the sky that was almost the afternoon Oren purplish.

"Why should the reverse come now? After all these years."

"Ignacia!" call someone who is running closer. The man finally came. His face looked happy but there was regret for coming late. As soon as he arrived, Rajendra immediately set his breath and sat down next to his lover.

"I'm sorry I'm late" he said on the sidelines to catch his breath.

"Why running? What if you fall?" Omel Ignacian. It was like scolding a child who did not listen to the words of a parent. Rajendra smiled instead, positioning himself to sit up straight and stare at Ignacia.

"I'm sorry I came late, Ignacia. We had to repeat the video several times because of mispronunciation and so on. Also the road is still jammed because there are trees downed the rest of the rain last night. I'm sorry. What if I buy something as ma-'s speech"

Rajendra had not finished his sentence, Ignacia did not want to hear and preferred to lean her head on Rajendra's shoulder. This girl needs nothing but her male existence. A simple apology is also fine if it is from Rajendra.

"Are you okay?" Rajendra's worried.

"No, I'm not okay."

"A-What's up? Any issues?"

Ignacia shook her head in response, "I just want you here. Just quiet. I'm tired."

Rajendra hugs his lover from the side, trying to give her the desired comfort. It wasn't her fault Ignacia became like this. This girl knew about the last group work before the graduation exam.

"Ignacia, I owe you a lot of apologies. I've been leaving you lately. I have a lot of business for my school and - when you can take time for me. But I can't."

"Don't the atmosphere become a bit sad now?" Ignacia pulled herself up, looking at Rajendra after goal, "I want to be with you for today. Don't apologize. You're not wrong, okay?"

"What if I buy food? You must be hungry after waiting for me long enough."

So this is a reply after waiting for Rajendra? But why did it feel like Ignacia was weighing on this man? Shouldn't reciprocity not burden someone? Rajendra won't think of anything bad about him right?

...*****...

"Which one do you want?"

They both arrived at a cafe. It's not just the coffee that's here. Some snacks that look cute and tasty are also there. Ignacia could see all the food in the glass window. Confused to choose one.

"Just like you, Rajendra."

"Why is that?"

"Let's eat what you want to eat. My order is to be with you."

Rajendra did not protest. If that's what Ignacia wants, he'll choose. While guessing what Ignacia wanted as well. The food was sweet, had fruit toppings, then cold drinks with a little coffee mix without making Ignacia stay up late tonight.

Ignacia wanted the best table that was by the window and away from the crowd. All the tables are owned by someone else. All that remains is a table in the middle of the room.

"Ignacia," call Rajendra, "you look weak. You exhausted? After this we go home, right?"

"Don't I tell you I want to spend time with you? What did you think of me in the park just now?" Ignacia's tired body made the girl a little sensitive. Ignacia wants to spend time after her long school days. Why did Rajendra say about going home?

"I don't want you to get sick, Ignacia. You have looked weak since. I'm afraid you're sick because of me. I didn't mean to make you angry. I'm sorry, Ignacia." Rajendra clasped his lover's hand on the soft table. His gaze he was aiming only for his beloved girl.

"No, it's not your fault. I just-was too carried away by emotions. Maybe I'm exhausted. All right, we can go home after this."

Ignacia takes her hand off Rajendra, pulls him in a hurry and is kept under the table. Rajendra is surprised, but soon he realizes that he should no longer bother his girl. Maybe Ignacia is upset that she came late, Rajendra thought.

Rajendra follows Ignacia to the front of the girl's house, but Ignacia has forbidden her lover. He said he wanted to make sure that Ignacia got home safely without anything lacking.

The atmosphere became unfriendly once Ignacia reached her front home. There is no warm aura that Rajendra usually feels every time he is in front of the residence of his loved ones.

"Ignacia, I'm sorry if I haven't been able to give my best today" Rajendra lirih whispered.

Ignacia walked over, giving the best smile she had for someone standing awkwardly before her. "Thank you for making sure I got home safely. Thank you for today, Rajendra."

"You've been kind, but I've become sickening. That relationship should be reciprocal. Not just one side of it." Inner Ignacia.