I'm Not the Perfect Wife
About Dira

"what time do you leave?" ask me on the phone.

"at 13:00 ay, to the house first yes" replied Dira.

"yes" I answered briefly, then I hung up.

What I feel should be an LDR with someone I care about, let me think this might be the best. And I hope he's okay there.

I rushed to see him too.

The bustle of the bustling streets, as if silent to me. My heart was silent, silent, empty.

I went to his house, I saw his face as if it were hard for this parting.

"Ay, "that's a call unfortunately for me.

"Ay, help me pack some clothes" she reprimanded, obliterating my daydreams all the way.

"hhmm iiiyya." I went straight to him and cleaned up some clothes that I put in his backpack, not many Dira carrying clothes, Dira people did not want complicated.

"ay, thank you, take care of your health here, do not be naughty, if you love me you have to love yourself first" he said.

Not much I said, just quiet.

"ay, I'm leaving!" in elus my head and kiss my forehead. Dira passed by with the car, he just waved his hand.

After the breakup, Dira and I had no communication because Dira did not bring a cell phone.

Two days passed......

My cell phone was silent never once there was any news from him.

When I broke down, two messages on my phone, no new.

085759######

ay, I've arrived. I can't contact you often until later if I already have a mobile phone.this is also my brother's pinjem phone.you take care of health there yes.

When I called back, Dira had already left for work. So it continues until approximately one month Dira just bought a cellphone.

085759######

ay, I already have a cell phone, this is the new me no. in save yes! I miss you the same. I'll call you later tonight.I work first.

the message made my heart happy.

......................

Then how was the situation here when I left Dira.

Rey was still always in touch with me, until I found out from Rey that Dira still had time to meet the frog princess, and some other women when she wanted to leave.

I'm disappointed, I don't believe him anymore. Thought you made me hurt so badly.

Because I communicate with Rey a lot, we finally meet in the real world.

With the motive of wanting to find out and maybe also escape from my disappointment and relationship with Rey.

Me, Dira both betrayed each other.

Rey and I are caught up in our game that was originally just near ordinary, but fate unites us in marriage.

Believe it or not that time passed so fast, I knew Rey before long, not as long as I knew Dira. However, Rey convinced me of the seriousness of a man.

What should I choose, before my clear eyes there is a serious man ready to marry me, then why do I wish that far away there that still does not give me certainty.

After Dira heard the news of my and Rey's marriage. Dira angry anger, disappointment that may be the same when I used to feel.

a message from Dira...

Then what I prepared all this for, the gold bracelet I bought for you, the ring and sandals I had prepared to give you when I came home. If I'm serious about you

I'm disappointed why you had to be with Rey, with a guy I don't like.

a message of disappointment from him. All the expressions I wanted to hear from the past, were spoken when I had chosen another. I can't back down to hurt Rey. I have to continue his intention of interrupting me.

......................

Our wedding preparations, one by one, are almost complete. I'm just preparing my mind, I'm setting myself up will I be a good wife to Rey. That's my heart-wrenching expression.

Dira was still always contacting me, unbeknownst to Rey, me and Dira were still in communication. The closer I got to my wedding day the more Dira called me, and then all this time why she didn't seem to want me, pulled my feelings out, giving me a hope but to other women the same gives the same hope, want as if not. I'm a woman, I need a certainty of my status, I need a commitment, not a false hope, not a pseudo sweet word. Everything is closed to her, I just want to get my happiness, I want to forget Dira, I want to bury the feelings that were once there for her, I want to bury her, I want to forget all about Dira and start my happiness.

That afternoon, I walked in with Rey intending to buy supplies for a handover, there was an incoming message from a man, Rey snatched my phone and broke my SIM card.

"who is this?, still dealing with people not clear, just change the SIM card, later I buy it" Rey seems a little disturbed with some of my boyfriend.

Rey is indeed the person jaim, cute, never showed his romance. But, if he does not like it, he immediately destroyed it.

Want to let alone, anyway Rey who will be my husband so I have to obey what he wants.

"It's a new no" Rey offered me a SIM card.

I took it and put it in.

"You know only your friends are important, non-essential numbers do not need to be stored" he said. I wonder if Rey will always behave like this. However, it seems disappointed that I will have a relationship that once closed my heart, so that I don't know what I feel, I just follow the course of my life. Can I just. That's just the part of the question I have to bury inside.

The equipment for the surrender has been fulfilled all. Time seems to spin so fast, the days just pass by.

I simply steadied myself with my worship, complaining to the owner of this body, surrendering to Him. There is no place to pour out this heart properly other than Him.

After changing my SIM card, Dira never contacted me. we lost contact, but Dira did not give up by visiting via phone, Dira contacted via social media, and, again Rey blocked our friendship. Rey has given me no space to befriend my closest male friend let alone her former name, Rey is overprotective.

And Dira also found out my new phone number through my close friend. Again and again Dira is not deterred from contacting me.

Even the morning before the wedding Dira still called me, Dira said she still could not believe what I was doing, Dira cried congratulating me, Dira still can't believe I made a decision that for him it was a very rash thing.

But this is my decision. Decisions as bitter or as sweet as anything I have to swallow, after this I will only be Rey's wife completely.

"don't disconnect this phone, let me listen remotely to your wedding procession, this is my last request before you get married" it's inconceivable what she's feeling. I followed what he wanted, when the phone was cut off Dira contacted me again just to listen to the process.

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