Beans Forgot the Skin
Chapter 3 Comma
POV Rudy
Tiara's been in a coma for five days, I've been allowed into my mother-in-law's office and allowed to, my heart still feels guilty and reluctant to leave Tiara. Arriving at Kalina's office approached me.
"Rud, why avoid me," he said.
"I'm sorry, my sins are too much, old sins are forgiven blom to make new sins again, forgive me for ever opening the opportunity of sin," I said steadily.
"Forgive me dear," he said spoiled.
"Forgive me and repent Kalina, old, the shroud is being woven we still like maksiat, I want to hijrah."
Kalina melengos left me who was still pecking at my office desk. After Kalina left, Revan, my office mate, approached me.
"Hi Rud, take a long time off, is it Tiara?" tanyakanya.
"Near of miscarriage" I replied.
"I grieve Rud. I'm impressed with Tiara, she was able to juggle you from a pelvic worker to a tie-in office worker again, it's true the saying behind a great man there is a great woman, Tiara is fine, right," he said full of search.
"Do you know Tiara, my wife?"
"Well, Tiara was my High School friend, her son was independent from a long time ago, lucky that you have a wife like her, even though your salary used to be mediocre she was able to keep it all down until you were finished and successful now." His eyes are looking at me sharply.
"You've had a crush on Tiara, yes" I said casually.
"We had a date but during my time in college we lost contact with each other and eventually I married my wife who modeled it Elmira's name, but unfortunately my marriage was only a corn, El turned out to be a luxurious lifestyle, I could not afford all his needs are all wow. So don't waste women as good as Tiara. If you hurt him I don't hesitate to take it from you" he said seriously.
I just look down unable to compete with Revan, I don't know I'm tired of my own thoughts. Finally Revan left me alone who was still wondering how the continuation of my love story with Tiara, whether there was a second chance for me or he would throw me into the ocean.
Diary Tiara I always take wherever I go, sheet by sheet I read with full of fantasy, like reading a novel that I became the main character, he said, sometimes I smile myself reading each character beautifully arranged. It came to a story that shook my heart and made my tears spill. I enjoyed my farewell moments with Tiara.
Tgl May 13, 2012
Hi Diary, hey,
This is the first time I got married to Mas Rudi. I was as good as my parents, they still did not like Mas Rudi and always made fun of him, my heart ached, if my choice of heart was insulted, just as insulting to me, just as insulting to me, not that the husband is the clothes of the wife and vice versa, sometimes Mama is not an adult let alone Papa, but they still respect my decision, Mama's words that corner Mas Rudi make me more motivated to help him become a scholar like me, I'll show you Mama and Papa that the ghost they look one eye at a time will boast of them. I don't like anyone insulting him even though my own parents. I will build her confidence and I am sure she will succeed, I will fight for her because I love my husband so much no matter what.
I cried many times, crying for my stupidity. Tiara I'm sorry, it turns out you don't want me to be insulted by your family, you want to show the world that who really means it will reap the rewards, Tiara thank you so much for giving me life lessons.
Why does the fear of loss arise when he really wants to leave me, Rome said.
If it is not new to feel
His presence is precious
It's hard I think I lost her
It's hard I think life without him.
That lyric dig told me all the feelings that haunted me all this time. Why for 8 years my marriage with her I didn't feel this scared. Back when he was so real I was busy looking for another love, he was so affectionate, sincere, sincere in love with me.
Suddenly my hair creaked, it turned out that Tiara had come to her senses, she was calling out my name, had she forgiven me. Lord give me the strength to face even the worst.
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Arriving at Tiara's room, I saw her crying hysterically looking for her baby, I was so scared to see her deep sadness. I am afraid, Rabb.
"Where is our son? What are you son of mine!" His impact.
Tiara was very shaken and kept crying, I tried to approach her but her eyes were looking at me cynically.
"Honey, our son is not there, Mas is not able to save you both, he is calm there baby, forgive Mas," I said lyirih.
"You killed my son, go! get the fuck out of here, I don't want to see your face again, killer."
His eyes pushy look at me, I have never seen this angry Tiara, maybe this is all the anger that had been buried in his chest now he can overflow everything.
"I'm sorry Tiara" I said.
I knelt on the floor, breaking my heart in fear, fear, chaos. Tears fell with my fragile heart.
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Tiara POV
His tears were flowing, there was no pity in my heart, he was roaring loudly. Hate, sick, tired, disappointed to be one. I hate this man, Rabb.
"Ampuni all my khilaf Ra, give me a second chance, I want to fix everything for the sake of our son" he said.
"I can't, I'm tired, tired, everything I want to end now" I said firmly.
"Ra, I beg you, how do you forgive me, we start over from the beginning baby" he said stammered.
I was getting hysterical and cursing at the man I once wholeheartedly loved, perhaps the effects of anger, disappointment, being pent up into a devastating tsunami of rage. My whole life I've never been this angry, like everybody else. My eyes are looking at him sharply.
"Mas, I want to put an end to all this, it's enough pain you've given me. Try to cry again, maybe this is the best thing for both of us" I cried.
"Ra, should I prostrate before you to hope for your forgiveness" he said softly. His eyes were wet with tears.
Actually I don't like this sad drama but the pain of losing a child and losing faith makes me sick of all this.
"I want to be alone, go, we introspect each other, maybe I'm guilty of this too, I never complain and talk about my grievances, I'm strong enough to face everything on my own and right now I'm fragile and want to stop, I'm tired of grieving and making friends with tears, you know what hurts the most is pretending to laugh when my heart cries, that's what I used to be, right now I don't want to repeat my same mistake, go."
Mom came into my room and calmed me down.
"Tiara don't make decisions when the heart is hot, your son, there's a lot to think about" Mama said.
"Ma, I'm sorry Ma, maybe I'll stay at Mama's house first, I want to calm my heart, please tell the man to go" I said.
"Rud, we should go home first, we'll talk about everything in a family way." Mama's eyes looked at Mas Rudi's pity.
"Ma, forgive Rudi Ma, forgive me," he sobbed in.
Finally he decided to leave because I showed a dislike for everything about him. I'm really wrathful.
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After I was discharged from the Hospital, Mama took me home to the house that raised me and I separated from her. Even though I don't feel like I'm shedding tears of goodbye.
That afternoon my body was already very fresh, but my memory of my baby was still constantly spinning and giving off a taste that squeezed all my reasoning, she said, lord, I do not accept your fate, I only miss him who once lay in my heart and once gave me the strength to fight even though it was filled with tears. Ndukk Mama misses, I hear tears coming from the corner of my eye.
Suddenly the man met me, his face was withered and pitiful, he was hurt by all my decisions, he was so pitiful.
"Tiara, I want to talk and express all the feelings that are pressing on my chest. I'm claustrophobic and sad." His eyes still swept over me.
"Mas, let's end it all yeah, find your happiness with that woman, I've given it all away, I don't love you anymore" I said.
"Sik, I'm sorry, how can you forgive me. Please, just give me one more chance, I've already taken the deck, there's no other woman in my heart but you baby" she said.
"Even if you seduce me, even though you have been converted but my love for you has died, your arrival does not have a comfortable effect on my heart anymore, let us walk alone first," I said seriously.
Grasping my finger, I watched every inch of his curve that began to sunk, highlighted his eyes there was a deep sense of regret, whether he had truly repented and regretted his actions but why my heart was frozen, he said, no more strange shivers in my heart, whether my love has died of that grudge, I don't know. Kuremas ends my piaay.
"Mas, forget about me, we go through it all by ourselves yes, I've taken care of everything in the religious court, just waiting for the hearing. Maybe this is the best way for both of us" I said seriously. Even though my eyes don't feel dewy.
"Ra, what about the brother, our eldest son. Is he not entitled to have a full family, Ra, please think carefully about your decision, there are children who are victims of your decision." Tears dripped from her sunken eyes.
"I'm sorry Mas, if I seem selfish but this has been my decision, let the child tomorrow know for himself if it's great who is right and who is wrong. My heart is not going to you again, what can you do, you are too late to get my heart again. My love and heart have died for your name."
Tears poured from his eyes, when I remember Mas Rudi was not a crybaby man, there was deep regret in the depths of his heart.
May all this be an afterthought for him, I want to teach him a lesson. That the love of a sincere wife loving with all her heart is the greatest gift in life. He once wasted that greatest gift. All that pain must be avenged with separation and pain so that he knows what it feels like to lose in order to realize that the meeting and togetherness are a blessing. Although my heart was sorry to see my man crying bitterly over his mistake. I'm sorry, I can't give you a second chance.
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