After Dark's
The Engagement Between Me and Him

That night's accident took my brother's life. This happened 3 weeks ago.

Since then, my mother has never spoken to me again, nor has she spoken to me. They've assumed I'm not home.

My heart hurts, my chest feels tight, I just want to apologize for everything that happened.

******

This afternoon, we had a guest. The family of a father who had run over my brother.

Mom and Dad welcomed them. Serve warm tea and a plate of snacks.

It seems that mama doesn't hate them, because mama's gaze is different from her gaze on me.

The purpose of their arrival to ask. Meminang a girl who is still sitting in 2nd grade Junior High. They do this as a form of responsibility.

Mama and Papa did not ask me this first, when they heard it they immediately agreed.

I, who was a child and still not accepted his opinion, was forced to agree to this engagement.

The older brother who will be my fiancee is a 2nd semester student from a top university.

He is very smart, his parents tell him that his son has been getting various awards since childhood. They're proud.

But when I looked at him. He doesn't look happy. From his fist it was clear that this engagement was not agreed.

Engagement only agreed upon by both parents.

******

The day and date of the engagement were set at the meeting that day. All Preparations are made three days before D-Day.

The day passed very quickly. Tomorrow night is the appointed day.

Mama approached me to the room, I who was lying in the bed was surprised to see mama.

I smiled broadly, it felt so happy. But, that feeling of pleasure was broken by my empty mother's gaze at me.

"From tomorrow you are no longer part of our family. I hope you can leave this house as soon as possible" Mama said

Why did my mom behave like this. Mama said it without blinking a bit, then just left.

"DID MOM HATE ME SO MUCH?"

The night before the engagement was held I looked in the room. If leaving this house makes mom and dad smile back I will.

I have always encouraged myself to try to accept all of this.

******

My engagement will be held later tonight. All the family from my mother's side came home.

I didn't leave the room until nightfall. Someone knocked on the door, they approached to decorate me.

After I finished wearing the dress, I went out not with my mom but with Aunt Sena.

Aunt Sena is your only sister. Aunt Sena was with me because my mom didn't want to be my side.

When the engagement was about to start, brother was still outside with his father.

I still haven't gotten acquainted with him. Just calling him big brother, it seems like he's the same age as my big brother.

We waited long enough. Everyone was wondering why the male side had not yet entered.

Aunt Sena told me to call them. I stood walking out, looking as if they were talking in front of the car.

I approached him..

My footsteps stopped when I heard their conversation. My brother begged his father to cancel the engagement.

"Pa I beg you, I don't want to marry her. I don't know him. I don't have any feelings for him either. WH WHY? Why do I have to pay for all the deeds of papa "

"You have to confess this all for papa's sake. You have to keep the girl old. Because papa has made the man who will save him die"

Her father stepped , walking towards me peeking. The older brother stood up then ran to prevent his papa,

"It was not my father who killed him, but the daughter who killed her own brother"

My feet were trembling to hear it.

He shouted quite loudly, his papa slapping.

"Why did papa slap me? Isn't that right? If only he hadn't pushed his brother back then, none of this would have happened! I HATE HIM SO MUCH!!!"

"ENOUGH, papa says enough. Now is not the time to argue. You don't want to get engaged to her"

My eyes started to glaze over. It was all my fault, I killed my brother.

When I wanted to step inside the house, my sister saw me. I looked into her eyes, her eyes the same as when she looked at me. A blank and cold gaze, a gaze full of anger and resentment.

I tried to talk, apologizing to him.

"Sister.."

I haven't spoken yet, he refuted my words.

"Who wants to be your sister? you remember well, I will never marry a woman who has killed her own brother !!!"

I was pensive, unable to say anything. Because I know I'm wrong...

******

The engagement went well. All of the guests present had already started to return home.

My dream of having a beautiful, luxurious, and magnificent engagement day is gone.

I heard from my friends that engagement day is a happy day for both parties. But why not with us?

After tonight's show was over, my mom handed me over to my sister's family. But they say they can't now.

My family is not from this city. They're just here for the holidays. My family should be back tomorrow morning.

"Hmmm. After our son-in-law graduated from High School tell him to come to our city and continue to study at our son's college"

Mama agreed to it and didn't give me up. I asked in my heart,

"Would not the handover process be done at the wedding. Why did you want to give me up too soon?"

This mixed feeling made my mind very chaotic.I didn't talk much on my engagement day. Just looking around at the guests, and closing their ears because they do not want to listen to the bad words they say about me.

How hard I closed my ears. Mama's face has shown everything that happened to the invited guests.

My eyes were turned to Mother Brother. He called me, told me to come closer. I walked to the chair where I was sitting.

"What's the aunt?" Ask me

"No need to call aunty, just call mom. Soon you will also be her only mother-in-law" Mom smiled at me.

Looking at my mother's smile, it made my heart feel a little warm. Mom said a few things to me. Telling me about Big Brother, telling me all about his childhood.

Mom also asked me a few things about my personality.We talked for quite a while. Until without realizing the clock has shown at 23.45 wib.

"Mom, we better go home now. Let our future son-in-law rest faster" said the brother's father

"I'm sorry mom talks too much (rubbing my back) until she forgets time" she said

After agreeing to some family discussions, the brother went home and never came back again.

******