The Love Story of the Doctor
Group Duties

" What else now? Am I on the horn? He saved 5 lives and sacrificed one life. Is God really that fair? Yes, I will try hard to live life as well as possible and the climate. As long as I live Honest, Sincere and Sincere then I will survive, at least God tests my patience at this time. To be honest, I am not ready to face this world alone, but why should I. Om, don't pick me.... Wh why? Um don't give me a choice I can choose. Why did the choice you asked me to choose between the choices I couldn't make. Is that fair to me, God? Why should Om Jojo choose me instead of Haidir, I love him and love him. He was so kind and gentle, while Om was rude and annoying. As much as she wanted to tell me this and that, I was depressed and not comfortable at all. I also have goals that I want to achieve someday, but all my future has been destroyed made by Om Jojo who for my family is an angel. But to me he was the disaster of my life. Did I make a mistake in my previous life that made God angry at me and gave me a lot of karma in my present life? How else now!!!".

I said annoyed while punching the bedroom window.

I still stared at the wall of my room,

Me" Ah.... Brother Haidir. It seems like God willed another on both of us, we were destined to meet and make love but parted anyway finally. It wasn't the farewell I owed but the meeting I regretted. Why should I meet and love us because in the end you and I are hurt too. I'm the one who hurt you cruelly, I'm the one who fooled you intentionally. But what is my daya Abang ...? The walls I had to face were so high and big. Just look at it I can't anymore, know Brother if I'm required to choose You, Om and Family. For sure, I will choose you...! But I was only given 2 choices that I did not want to choose. My mother and sister...! I'd rather just give in to my nasip. Know Brother, even now I am still not willing to be with Om. God predestined me for him, God has another way for me. Then what should I do, dear brother? How am I supposed to get through you if we meet in the middle of the road? Let's just say Ulan Nafisah Anggara is dead...!!"

I said with tears dripping down so hard.

Many times I have wiped away my tears, but my tears seem to be more honest than my heart.

I kept recalling fond memories with Haidir while we were on campus. Prayer and eating together, I also often bring bontot for us to eat together.

So are my fond memories of being with my sister when we went on vacation with family when we were kids. So sweet and beautiful at that time, my sister and I loved playing and joking.

But.....

All the....

Sire....

When I remember how Om treated me, it forced me to even take my first kiss. Haidir never kissed me even though we were together for a long time. I remember every inch how Om forced me to do what he wanted, and Om also threatened me with such a sharp and sadistic look

It scared me to death, to the point that I couldn't think realistically. He made me obey him, all his wills and orders I must obey.

Oh, dearGod. Is this fair to me?

Indirectly, Om has bought me with cash. Mom needs treatment and Om needs me. The one-sided exchange made me have to just step down and follow.

" I don't think anything's fair to me! Why did this have to happen to me? What sins have I committed in my past life, so that my fate is like this? Am I wrong? Have my past sins not been forgiven by you O Rabb....?".

I said in my heart I regret what happened to me.

I want to protest against him. Do I not deserve to live in this world well with the people I love and love?

I must forsake my love, I must cast away my heart. Lord, take my heart away, never come back until the angel of life comes to see me. I want my heart to remain clean and holy from the filth of this world. Take my heart, never come back.

God, why do I have to face my poor life. Why not just take my life, at least I'm still like the old Ulan again.

At least my heart is still the same as it used to be, completely mine. Completely still I have, not hurt and tarnished. If this is the best, the best is chosen by Mu the Most Love. I accepted.

I'll learn to accept, though,

I'll study for the Class....

My daydream was so long, my heart was so broken when my parents said so. Jojo, for you I am a gift, but for me you are a disaster.

" Your selfishness, stubbornness and desire have brought me to the brink. I almost went to hell because of you, is your love as strong and good as it will be? Only God knows, I lost....!!!".

I said while staring at the window.

I felt my world collapse instantly,

I feel my heart breaking all...

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